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Saturday, June 24, 2006

My Kingdon for a Sturdy C _ _ _ _!!

Ok, so here's the deal. When going out for an evening there are several things you have to take in to consideration. Things like: what show are you going to, where should you eat, who gets to drink and who gets iced tea all night so both of you don't end up doing something inappropriate in the back taxi on the way home that shows up 2 weeks later on www.CheckOutTheCrazyShtThatGoesOnInMyCab.com. Yeah...you know who you are!

Other than that you are able to set out on a nice evening (hopefully Taxi free). You get to the restaurant and you're seated on time. Your food is great and you are out of there in time to catch your show! Of course, the show was amazing. It was that movie that had that actor you like so much running from that radioactive creature...you know the one spawned from that toxic waste spill at the toy shop?? A purple dinosaur on a rampage singing childrens' songs and eating the flesh from tourists in some futuristic meropolitan city...

Damn! I tend to ramble! Ok, The point I'm trying to make is, that beyond the normal prep most people are able to enjoy an evening out without too much difficulty. Guess whose nightmare is just starting? You guessed it...mine and the rest of us who have managed to carry around a bit of unwanted fat. There is one thing that can change that perfect evening into an uncomfortable and possibly embarrassing fiasco. Can anyone guess what that is?...I'll help you out...

Lack of a STURDY CHAIR!!

It seems like such a simple thing but you would be surprised how terrible it feels to walk into a restaurant and see nothing but flimsy plastic chairs around all of the tables or to find out that there is nothing left but a tiny booth. "Arrrrrrgh! Ok breath..it's not the end of the world", you tell yourself. Surely they have a sturdy chair somewhere in the building. So you collect yourself and you walk calmly over to a Waiter and say, "Pardon me sir . But do you happen to have a different type of chair?" The waiter turns to you...looks over the top of his glasses and gives you the once over and says, "no." and turns back around. Feeling the panic and frustration welling beep within you tap the waiter on his shoulder and ask, "no other chairs?....in the whole building? in an office maybe." Again the answer comes, "no sir we have these." "would you like to be seated?" And I'm thinking..."On What?" "You have barbie dream house chairs!" "Have you ever seen Ken sporting an Ass this big? now bring me a proper chair you twit!!" Well, that's what I'm thinking anyway...what I say is more like "No thanks *sigh* we'll try somewhere else..."

With that, a new place to eat has to be found and the whole evening's plans must be tossed out the window. Or I could risk sitting on a toothpick legged, gumby fun house chair...making sure not to breath the wrong way or reach the wrong way or blink the wrong way and hooooope that I don't hear that all too familiar craaaack which generally proceeds my keister hitting the tile and the entire clientele snapping their necks to get a look at the fat guy floundering around on the floor!

Can you tell I how worked up this situation can make me? At one point I acctually started carrying a stool around in the trunk of my car for just such an occaision. Now granted. I can't expect every restaurant to cater to the needs of someone as obviously abnormal (with regards to weight) as myself. I just ask that they take a few things into mind before buying chairs for their patrons to sit on.
1. please have at least a few Chairs without Arms...
2. If you insist on having plastic chairs...maybe have a couple of metal chairs on hand for those of us who might break your normal ones...this will not only increase your business but decrease your chance of being sued over an avoidable accident.
3. just understand that comfortable seating is important to your business' success.

----end---rant---

You wanted honest ;) Thanks for indulging me folks!

Please feel free to ask me questions if you have them. If there is anything you want to know about me please post or email your question. My email is ukefoo@earthlink.net . Please don't be shy...I'll answer almost anything. (did I just open a can of worms?) ....git back in der worm!!

11 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I always like checking in to see what's going on - rants, food, trips to the gym, daily trials. It's all good, man.

Thanks for getting it all down & out.

9:53 AM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Terri Kloth said...

Great site. Your writing is humourous and honest. One thing our (Western) society cares little about altering is fat phobia. It's still ok to ignore and even ridicule the needs of obese people. The "your-own-fault" mentality is alive and kicking. I, for one, prefer to encourage positive personal change no matter what. So keep it on, persevere, and one day you will live to tell.

4:57 PM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger nikki said...

Oh goodness Sean... today's post reminded me of a day trip my boyfriend and I took a few years back. We were on a little island for the day, checking out the vineyards and taking pictures of the parks and beach, when we decided to stop in the restaurant for lunch. I didn't think anything of sitting down in the little orange plastic chair, until 10 minutes later, when it fell through the legs and I ended up on the floor! I've always been able to laugh off public stumbles, but thinking of that incident always makes me blush... I feel your pain and frustration. Ever since then, I've always been a little wary about where I park myself!

You seem to be doing a great job so far, I enjoy reading your posts and draw a lot of inspiration from you. Take care, Nikki

6:36 PM, June 25, 2006  
Anonymous amy said...

Great thoughts, Sean. I, too have had embarrassing moments with chairs, so I can totally relate!

Keep up the crusade, man!

9:22 PM, June 25, 2006  
Anonymous Vivien said...

I can only imagine what you're going through...I'm a recently-turned-20-year-old who weighs 155lbs, and I used to weigh 10lbs heavier until I forced myself to get to the gym and it's still a daily struggle to keep up the motivation to eat better and exercise frequently. And although my situation isn't the same as yours, just know that there are others going through similar things and you are by far the bravest for putting it all out there. Good luck! I'll be following your progress, I'm sure you'll do fabulously. :)

9:27 PM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Billy Guilfoyle said...

Tell us about pool parties.

10:16 PM, June 25, 2006  
Blogger Sean Perkey said...

Anonymous: Glad to have you checkin'! Thanks for being here to read it all!

terri kloth:
I feel like a missed an era... *lights a candle* I appreciate your kind comments regarding my writing but you, my friend, have the market cornered on introspective style! I only wish you still maintained your blog. I did notice that you tended to take breaks from time to time as do we all. Perhaps one day you'll rediscover your muse. Or maybe you've said what needing saying? Either way, Thank you for your encouragement and I do hope you'll check back from time to time. Also, i agree with you. It seems like the obese are one of the only groups it that society condones ridicule of. I don't even begin to admit knowing the answer to that one.

nikki: So you know what I'm talking about! And it's not even big people who have that problem. Restaurants know that those things will break and that they can just go out and buy 20 more for $5 each at the next mall sale. They don't stop to think that they would save so much money if they just bought good chairs once instead of replacing them all the time! Arrrgh! *shakes fists*

Thanks for sharing you experience! That helps a bit!..also thanks for youe support! Make sure you check back and let me know how I'm doing! I get inspiration from you too!

amy: Grrrr at chairs huh? that's what I say! Say it with me Grrrrr! Thanks! I feel better! :)

vivien: See it's not just the severly over weight that go through this. It's everyone...10 lbs or 250 lbs. we all have our work to put in and none of us get anywhere until we get up and go! I'll accept your compliment about being brave...although it's only brave with regard to my ego but i figured that if I was quiet about my situation every other time I dieted and it didn't work then this time I'll try telling everyone...and when I say everyone...well..you get the picture! ;)

Thanks for your kind words and well wishes! I hope to see you post again! take care and congrats maintaining your own weight!

Billy: what pool parties man! I haven't been in a pool in like 15 years... yet another reason to loose some weight..so's I can get's my swim on

3:39 AM, June 26, 2006  
Blogger buchilala said...

Pools are awesome! I had been eating right and working out up to about a month before i read your post. I had lost 25+ pounds and lost my motivation because I had gone home for a week and subsequently gained 10 lbs. Seriousely i can't eat good around those people, push food on you and then comment about how your fat. Sorry about that. But since reading your blog my wife and I have gone back on our diet and started working out more dilligently. We have a pool at our apartment and I have always worn a shirt out of embarassment. But recently I have decided that if others don't like my fat they can deal, I'm not wearing a shirt, others don't have to. Thanks for getting me back on my diet Sean.

Nick

12:11 PM, June 26, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Perfect post!

12:23 PM, June 26, 2006  
Blogger Sean Perkey said...

Nick: I know what you mean about that shirt in the pool thing. I'll I'd wear a shirt when I showered if it didn't get in the way of getting clean..J/k I have serious issues with my body at this point but I know with time that hang up will pass...there are a lot of ridiculous things we do to try and cover the fact that we are "fat" and it's just stupid...like people don't know I'm fat because I'm wearing an extra layer of clothes? We do it for our own comfort but just end up uncomfortable and people still know...funny huh? I'm glad to hear that you and your wife are getting back up on that horse! We all get off course at times. And to think that I may have inspired that is overwhelming. I guess I hadn't expected that reaction to my blogging about my journey. I was looking for inspiration and if it turns out that I can give a little back then that's pretty cool!

I can't wait to get back into a pool... puttin' that on the list.

2:16 AM, June 28, 2006  
Blogger Sean Perkey said...

Anonymous: Why thank you! :)

2:17 AM, June 28, 2006  

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