Watch My Loss

fitness resources brought to my attention!

2007-01-18T23:47:00.000-08:00

I received a few emails this week regarding some weight loss resources/ Motivational programs that some kind folks thought I and my readers (That's you ;0) ) would like to know about.

The first and most TIME SENSITIVE information was sent to me from NIKKI at M80 and it's a Weight Loss program and Competition being offered by Kmart & M80 called New Day Your Way !

ACT NOW: Registration Ends at 11:59pm on January 20 (eastern time)

According to her email and the information on the web site:

The New Day Your Way contest is open to those living in 19 select US markets, with registration taking place 01/07-01/20. 10 finalists will be selected from each of the 19 markets to participate for the grand prize - $10,000 Cash, Total Beauty Makeover in NYC, $1,000 Kmart Gift Card, a 3-Year Membership to Bally's Total Fitness (including 10 personal trainer sessions), and Treadmill. For a list of the 19 participating markets, or to register for the New Day Your Way contest, go to http://www.kmart.com/newday.

this is a list of the Areas that are included in the contest: Chicago, IL, Cleveland, OH, Detroit, MI, East Brunswick, NJ, Honolulu, HI, Long Island, NY, Los Angeles, CA, Miami, FL, New York, NY, Philadelphia, PA, Pittsburgh, PA, San Francisco/Bay Area, CA, San Juan, PR, Tampa, FL, Tamuning, Guam, Washington, DC, St. Louis, MO, Virginia Beach, VA, Salt Lake City, UT.

So if you live in one of these areas and think this might be a fun and motivational program I encourage you to sign up and if you do let me know so that We can keep everyone updated on your progress!!

I went ahead and submitted an application but I think I'm outside of their Area...we'll see!

Thanks Nikki! I hope we get some takers! This could be a fun one!

The second Item was sent to me by a gentleman Named Sean (and yes Sean I agree that is a fantastic name!) who assures me that he does NOT watch Oprah everyday but happened to be tuning in recently and heard them mention that they were looking for people to send in their profiles and weight loss goals in order to receive valuable fitness and health tips from her trainer Bob Greene as well as possibly being featured on the show.

Here is some info from the website: Bob Greene's Best Life Diet

Ready to commit to your health and lose weight? Bob Greene and Oprah want to hear from you! Send Oprah.com your weight loss goals and a recent photo of yourself.

Tell us about yourself: How much do you weigh? How tall are you? How have you gained the weight? Do you have any medical problems we should know about? Are you married? How many kids do you have? Do you work? What do you think is holding you back from living your best life and losing the weight?

Photo Information:
When prompted, you will be permitted to submit up to three photos. The photos you upload should include only yourself, and be full body shots if possible.

I had mentioned before that when I reach my goal and had raised the funds I pledged to raise for Diabetes Research I'd love to present the check to the ADA on her show. So who knows maybe this is a little push from destiny to get me back up on that horse!

Thanks Sean! Great Link and thanks for the support!

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On a more personal Note I did end up making it to the gym on Friday of last week for a swim. I also went Saturday, Monday, Tuesday and will hit it again on Friday after work. I'm feeling a bit more limber although that nagging foot pain is back. Thank goodnes for the pool but i really just wish it would stop hurting all together. Maybe when some of the weight comes off it'll improve. Time will tell.

Oh yeah. I'm still looking for a scale and have started calling outside of my medical care provider. I know someone has to have a Scale that is accurate at my weight and as much as I know you all want to see pictures of me weighing myself at the post office...it ain't gonna happen...LOL!

oooh the lameness...

2007-01-12T02:05:00.000-08:00

Where's that motivation I was so proud of! Enough fooling around. I'm beggin everyone to send me strong motivational vibes so I can get my butt in the gym on Saturday, get some shopping done and get my room cleaned. ...Maybe I can swim friday night. That would be a good start... I gotta kick this thing into gear somehow.

*sigh*

The further power of One red Paperclip...

2007-01-05T02:20:00.000-08:00

If you are not yet familliar with the phenomenon that is "One Red Paperclip" I suggest that you quickly high tail it over to the Website and get caught up! CLICK HERE

There is no doubt that Kyle has inspired folks to world over to follow their dreams no matter how small or large and today...out of the blue I was reminded just how far reaching his special brand of influence has been.

So there I am earlier this evening, just minding my own business, 'bout ready to settle down in my chair, at the movies, about to watch sneak preview of "Smokin' Aces" and who should I see up on the Big o'le Silver screen singing her heart out and looking as beautiful as ever?
Why, new music sensation, Jody Gnant that's who! Her new music video was playing before the feature.

"Who's Jody Gnant?", you ask.... (well keep reading)

I jumped up and turned to my brother and said. "Hey! I know her....she's the one who traded that Paperclip guy for that recording contract that time!" (names escape me when I'm excited!)
Sufice it to say I was very proud and when I settled down I was able to better explain who she was and what I was babbling about.

Some of you found this blog through Klye's ORP site so you know why I find this so exciting. Jody is a rare spirit who is very deserving of her new found celebrity. She has been an constant supporter of my efforts like all of you who are so wonderful to me here and I couldn't be more excited or proud of her for her continued success.

Please do me a huge favor and visit her website and sign her guest book and wish her success and happiness. Jody Gnant.com

and while you're at it check out some of the other interesting projects that have spawned in great part due to the success of One red Paperclip.com

Hitch50.com

Are You My Wife.com

Choose My Name.com

With so much drive and success around me how can I possibly give up. What a wonderful world wide web.

Weights and measurments

2007-01-03T02:26:00.000-08:00

I think that this time around the less unknown variables the better. I expect to spend Jan getting my workouts back on track and getting back to an overall healthier daily menu (the holidays...*sigh* need I say more?). One of my most improtant tasks will be to find a Scale in Sacramento that will Accurately weigh me so that I can count on it whenever I choose to weigh in. I've had a lot of suggestions on where to find such a scale ( and some pretty ineteresting ideas at that). My first hope is to find some medical establishment in town with a high capacity scale...barring that I'll give the less orthodox opptions a chance.

Ok so Try once again to bare with me...no weigh-in until the end of the month but then I hope they will come more regularly after that!

Happy Wednesday!

The long haul is a long haul...

2007-01-02T01:00:00.000-08:00

First let me say Happy New Years to all of you wonderful people. I hope your holiday season was merry and full of warm cheerfull and moments with family and friends.

Last year I went through quite few personl struggles. I made huge personal improvement goals and the proceded to have my worst health year to date. Between a chronic bad left foot, severe fatigue, a Car Crash early in the year that, no doubt, contributed to my over all stiffness and soreness the rest of the year, Insomnia, narcolepsy and ending the year with a horrible respretory infection and losing my voice for the better part of 2 weeks. Oh yeah...all that and I weigh over 520lbs.

Some would call those excuses and in fact some have called them exactly that. I supposed they're entitled to that opinion. I'm not too enclined to let that deter me.

I'm going to make this pretty short and simple. At the begining of the year we all get a fresh start and so i'm taking mine. Back up on the horse. I still have a lot of work to do...so let's get to it!

#48 and #49!

2006-11-28T11:14:00.000-08:00

Well, as promised...My really great, big ole fun, really kick arse weekend!

So, the plan was to set out on Friday evening and go visit my Family in Danville Ca. A sort of late Thanksgiving with my father and his wife, all my brothers and their respective wives/ sig. others. I had planned on staying there Friday and Saturday nights to maximize family time...cause ya know...it's improtant and I really enjoy when everyone gets together!

Well, I got home Thursday night from Thanksgiving with my younger brother and his girlfriend's family and in my email inbox was a message that would change everything!

"Dude!?", the message started... "Are you still down to do that thing you said you'd do that time when you said that you'd do it later if we needed you to do it!?" I quickly typed back.."Yah-buddy! When and where?" and the response came back. "Dude! Rock! Reno, Nv 3:30pm Saturday!", to which I relplied..."righteous!" I then proceded to shred a juciy air guitar riff ala Bill and Ted. Called up the Fam and told them I'b be late to the shindig! I then texted my buddy Aaron! If I was going to drive the 150 or so odd miles to reno I needed to call in the big guns to travel shotgun and keep this ole narcoleptic a wake!

Cut to Saturday...{The Crack Of Noon} Clean all the water bottles and diet pepsi bottles out of the car, Load up the tunes, toss 2 ukuleles in the back seat along with some magizines...Gass up the Chevy 'Bu and hit the Road! The stereo fuled by the powerfull stylings of oneTenacious D Rocked the road trip and soon we were swinging into Reno. Well, do I have to say it...'When in Reno...' Next thing I know...Ding-ding-ding! I won $100! Sweeeeeat! We played a bit longer without repeating my good fortune and then realized that we had better skeedaddle to the Ron-day-vu A-sap...for the hour of 3:30 was nigh at hand and the sacraed Task with which i was dutifully charged meant a quick juant to the Reno Airport.

We arrive at the airport and swing into the passenger pickup. With swiss like precision they roll out as we roll in. No need for introductions...no awkward guessing game....

'uh...izzat them?'
'I dunno dude...izzzit?'
'uh go ask...'
'you go ask...'
'alright I will...' 'fine.....!'
'fine!'

No need for any of that, for the heros we saught had their names emblazened across their chests and they were known throughout the land as "Scotty and Fiddy! Two weary travelers attempting to 'hitchhike" to 50 US State Capitols in 50 days. As fortune would have it they only had 3 states to complete and they were close enough for me to pick them up and take them to 2 of the remaining 2..Carson City,NV and my very own home town...the city of trees and the birth place of Tower Records and the Pony Express Sacramento, CA.

Carson City, Nv

As you can see above we stormed into Carson City and taught it a thing or two about some crazy jumping and some funky posing! Having done what we came to do and noting that Carson City had very little interest in jumping or, for that matter, displaying a pulse of any kind we descided to bail that burg and rock on over to Reno for some much needed buffet action!

Let me tell something to you...come a little closer! The Eldorado Buffet is "SECOND TO NONE!" Period!(and I managed to limit myself even with evey imaginable nummy distraction you could imagine!

After that we all piled back into the Malibu and headed off to Capitol #49 and my hometown, Sacrameto, Ca! Hit the Capitol buliding...Jumpy, jumpy...Clicky, clicky and we were off! I thought I would surprise the guys by taking them by the site of the original Tower records, which I thought would be interesting or them until I realized even though Tower may be an international company...they may not have them in Canada...my suspicion was confirmed and esentially to them I was just showing off some random record store! Sweat!

At this point we dropped off my buddy Aaron! Thanks Aaron for Keeping me company on my drive to reno and for being a good sport about letting me play your music for Scotty and Fiddy along the way! I know you're not all about the self promo but your music is amazing and I can't help but pimp it when I get the chance!

The rest of the trip was pterry much chill...we hit the gas station for gas and road snacks, did a drive by on Historical Old Sacramento and then headed out of town. A couple hours later and we were in Cupertino, Ca. (Home of Apple Computers)
We quietly said our good byes. At this point I think the guys were pretty tired, I know I was. I only did about 500 miles and 13 hours of their journey bt I can only imagine how exhausted they must be and how excited they must be about getting to HI and knocking out that 50th state Capitol!

I finally rolled into Danville at about 1:30am and crashed on my father's couch! I think I actually got a good 7 or 8 hours sleep that night for the first time in nearly 6 months. I spent sunday lounging around with my family watching football and vacation videos. It was the perfect way to top off a long and exciting weekend

My Big Weekend Adventure!

2006-11-27T04:55:00.000-08:00

Wow! What a weekend! I'm gonna tell you all about it tonight but for now I sleep!

; )

Gobble Gobble!

2006-11-23T06:48:00.000-08:00

Just a quick note to those few I haven't lost through my low posting days. I want to wish you a very happy Thanksgiving (if you are in the U.S.) and a very happy Thursday if your are in some other wonderful place.

On the health front. I started taking Ambien and I think it may be working. My brother has tried to wake me twice on two different mornings and was not able to. While that may mean that I'm sleeping soundly...I'm not sure I like being that out of it. I guess I'll take what I can get. Also I'm not going to try to fool myself about eating less on thanksgiving...I plan to enjoy myself and on monday I plan to start taking a daily walk at a near by park. I'm hoping that I'll be able to work up the stamina to walk and jog a little. I remember that the times I've been able to lose weight effectivly I was jogging. I'm running out of ideas but I will not give up.

Thanks again everyone. have a beautiful day!

Sean

Way to go P!

2006-11-17T07:18:00.000-08:00

There's an old joke that goes:

Q: "What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?"
A: "A Dobermen Pinscher"

Well as of Wednesday I can reword that joke to say:

Q: "What's black and brown and looks good on MY BROTHER P.?"
A: "A Dobermen Pinscher"

That's right folks! My big brother P. just found out that he Passed the New York BAR exam and I couldn't be happier for him or prouder of him. I know how hard he and his wife worked to make this happen! I just want him to know that he is an inspiration to me and he proved to me that anything can be achieved with hard work and determination. I know that things haven't gone exactly to plan for me over these first 5 months but I'm more determined than ever to see this through. Thanks P. And Congrats! Can't wait to see you in 2 weeks!

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News from my world is pretty much the same. I've been eating a lot of chicken and rice and had a really good workout the other day but Thursday I had to cancel due to a cold or some really bad allergies but I'm medicating and I plan to hit the gym and maybe the pool on Friday.

Other than that not much to report except...if you get a chance Check out this Blog (Shirts-by-eye) by one of the kind folks who follows my blog on a regular basis. Mr. The eye has designed some pretty funny tee-shirts and they're for sale if you're so inclined. The designs are very simple but the style and the whit make them pretty damn funny. I think I may buy one or two for gifts...
Either way make sure you swing on over and take a look and pass the link around if you feel that a friend or family member may be interested.

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That's it for now! Congrats again Bro!

My mind has a mind of its own!

2006-11-14T03:55:00.000-08:00

I'm honestly begining to think that I may never sleep correctly again. Some days I just want to scream and pull out my hair. (i don't though...don't worry)

I stayed in bed most of the day again just hoping that I would get a little sleep so I could stop feeling so crappy. I got a little and I'm back to feeling generally blah which is about as good as it gets now days. Anyone know a good hypnotherapist out there...you know someone who could make it so that I fall asleep when I ring a bell or something...of course, one who is ethical and wouldn't make me act like a chicken or something foolish. Not that I wouldn't live with that humilliation if it meant a deep and meaningful sleep on a regular basis.

Anyhoo...

I need to shop for food to cook at home so I went out and ate chicken, steamed rice and broccoli again for dinner. Then I went and did an hour in the pool. Then I sat in my car for a while reading a magazine. Have I ever told you how much I like sitting in my car and reading. I mean, We buy these expensive cars with these wonderfully comfy seats and all we do is drive in them...sometimes I like to go park, roll down the windows, lay the seat back a bit and get my read on. It really is relaxing.
Anyway...I read for a bit until I felt drowsy and then I went home and tried to sleep for about an hour which just left me completely wired and now...here I am.

Maybe I just need someone to whack me on the head. Or (and this might not be the most manly thing to say) maybe I just heen a good head massage and a snuggle-up! ;0)

(I'm going to try to think of something uplifting to post tomorrow.... =0) )

slow day...

2006-11-10T08:06:00.000-08:00

I didn't do much today but try to sleep...I got up pretty late and didn't get a chance to eat before my workout so i just went to the gym and didn't eat until much later in the evening...I know...Bad. So I had 3 chicken soft tacos...argh..I know..I know.

workout:
squat step knee-lift (with one foot on a low step squat then step up and lift the opposite knee...2 sets -1 minute each leg (aprox 20 reps)

tricepts(?) pull down 15 reps w/(forgot the weight) each arm - 2 sets

Squat - wood chop 10 reps each side 3 sets

Standing bench press- 3 sets 15 reps

yawn

2006-11-09T07:23:00.000-08:00

"That we are not much sicker and much madder than we are is due exclusively to that most blessed and blessing of all natural graces, sleep." -- Aldous Huxley

food/ workout

I don't think i'll ever be a morning or a breakfast person. Nope...not me. That said my first meal was chicken w/ steamed rice and veggies and for dinner I went to this Greek place for a big salad with chicken and a couple falafel...can you say "yum?" I know I can. =0)

I missed my workout on tuesday because I hadn't slept in aprox 3 days. So. with about 3 hours sleep under my belt on wednesday I figured I'd better get in for a quick one. I was able to squeeze out 5 sets of 20 crunches, 3 sets of 135lb bench presses (15 reps) and 3 sets of 15 reps of rows w/ 165lbs. Then 40 minutes of brisk pool walking. now I can't move my arms...*owie*

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The only other think I have to say at the moment is Thank you America for getting out in record #'s and voting for change. lets hope that some fresh perspective and some opposing oversight will lead to a safe and reasonable conclusion in Iraq and the return of our brave men and women in the armed forces. This is the last I'll speak of this because of the divisive nature of politics and that is not what I want this forum to be about.

11/6/06

2006-11-07T05:27:00.000-08:00

Got a late start this morning and didn't eat much throughout the day. Had turkey sandwich on Wheat bread for my mid day meal and then had Teriyaki Chicken with steamed rice and broccoli for dinner. I did have a small popcorn (no butter)) and a diet coke at a movie last night...not the best in the world but considdering that I used to eat a large without thinking about it and I didn't completely finish the small...not so bad.

I got to the gym for a short workout: 60 crunches, 45 reps bench press w/ 130 lbs, and 20 min on the treadmill. I was going to swim instead of the treadmill but I was running late.

Not much else to report but I wanted to post to get back in the habit. Oh I want to thank K.A. for the ticket to see BABEL. I hope you feel better soon! I'll tell you about the movie next time we talk.

ok then...ttfn ;0)

Hey...

2006-11-06T07:02:00.000-08:00

I thought long and hard about how to word a bunch of stuff and sought some council about what to say in this post. I suppose I could write areally long post about how I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while but I don't really want to. Lets just say that I've been dealing with a fair amount of personal garbage for the last 2 weeks. Some of it internal and obviously some of it external. I know a fair amount of my funk is due to not sleeping...still...and some of it has to do with the season. I really love the fall but I'm always haunted by certain memories and certain feelings associated with this time of year and it always sneaks up on me and I tend to shut down for a while. Then there's the first anniversary of our (my and my brother's) mother's death later this month and I'm sure that plays a part.

All these things jumbled up with some lonliness and binge eating and I haven't really felt like posting for a while.

I think I'm through the worst of it and I'm looking to get back on a solid routine with the posting so let's try this again.

Needless to say I didn't lose the extra 10 lbs I wanted to after my birthday...i'm making an effort to get back to eating correctly so I think I should start posting my daily diet again as a check against bad habit forming. Oh...my cholesterol is down 4 points from 138 to 134...that's always been pretty good but my A1C (3 mon average blood sugar) is up from 6.6 to 7.2 again which is strange because my daily readings haven't been really getting worse. I wonder if it's the sleep...I dunno. I'll be seeing my dr on Tuesday.

One good thing is that the Provigil is doing what it should, It eliminates daytime sleepiness and has done that pretty effectivly. I've only had a couple of days where I feel tired in the late afternoon but my Dr is still addjusting the dose. I guess I have been getting about 3 hours of sleep at night so that's a little better but Now I have to string them together...add 2 more hours and make them come before 6am so I can get back to work full time. With any luck It's not far off.

I guess that's about it. I'll be answering all of your previous posts later this evening and Thank you again for all your support. I'm still in this thing and with a positive outlook but I had to take some time to get my head straight so I didn't feel so anti social...I'm getting there =0)

New Year's Resolution Goals!

2006-10-24T04:08:00.000-07:00

It's something I've done for a few years now because I think it makes more sense than the traditional way. Today is my 36th Birthday and, yearly, on this day, I generally make whatever resolutions I plan to make for the year ahead. I feel that I'm in the fortunate position, this year, to just stay on track and keep working toward the goals that I have already set. My course is layed out for me and I know with hard work, dedication and a little patience with myself I will be in a fantastic place in a year and during the year I will continue to feel better about my self and will enhance my joy and zest for life in all aspects.

The few things I will work on are...

1: Being patient with my weight loss and looking for positive signs of improvement rather than focusing on lack of progress in other areas.

2: Try harder to value my worth and to remember that I am worthy of being happy. I want to approach certain social situations with more confidence and be aware that if things don't work out the way I hope it's not the end of the world or a comment on my self worth.

3. Organize, Organize, Organize!

4. Attempt to be a better brother and son and friend. (there's always more we can to do include our family and good friends)

5. Plan more seriously for my financial future.

I don't expect to start a resolution revolution here. This is just how I do it and you can adopt it if you like.

In other news. I had my appt with Dr Wong last Thursday. He's my new sleep disorder specialist and while he said that I don't have ALL of the traditional Symptoms of Narcolepsy he did say I have enough of them including some variant symptoms that he would prescribe the recommended medication for Narcolepsy and order more conclusive tests. I'll also be going back to the sleep lab to have tests to calibrate my bi-PAP machine for my sleep apnea (bi-pap and c-pap machines blow air in to your airway while you sleep so that you don't stop breathing....fun huh)

The medication I'm taking is called Provigil

For info Please visit www.Provigilweb.com

(From Provigilweb.com)
A Different Kind of Stimulant

Unlike caffeine and older prescription stimulants that affect the entire central nervous system which in turn leads to jitteriness, insomnia and prolonged bouts of sleep to make up for lost sleep, Provigil only seems to effect the part of the brain that keeps you awake. A person's sleep patterns will usually revert back to normal after the effects of Provigil wear off. U.S. clinical trials have also demonstrated that Provigil is less likely to cause nervousness or withdrawal-like symptoms.

I started taking it on Friday and will be increasing from 1 to 3 tablets daily by thursday and after a few days of that I'll let you all know how I feel. As it is I can already tell that my daytime alertness is a little better but it does feel like it's chemically induced...and I'm still not sleeping that well at night, however When I finally do get to sleep...(sometimes as late as 4am or 6am...I can sleep for about 3 1/2 hours so that's about 1 1/2 hours more than before. If I can start getting to sleep around 1am and sleep for 5 hours I'll be back in charge of my life again and then watch out world...haHaahAahhhaaa! *cough*

Ok...so that's about it for now. I'll be starting my 365day picture project Today and will post the link to my Photo host in a couple of days. Also I'll be weighing in again around the end of the month because I was trying to get another 10 lbs off (no worries if it doesn't happen). I'll let you know. Also let me know if you think I should add another counter that shows actual Fat loss as well as over all weight loss. I was thinking about it.

Have a good day all, and a great New Year! =0)

Walk a mile in my shoes...no, seriously...go ahead!

2006-10-19T01:45:00.000-07:00

Hey there!

So I mentioned in my last post that I had gotten some new shoes and that they seemed to be doingthe trick as far as providing the support my foot needs and the comfort I need when I'm on my feet!

I really have to give the credit to my buddy devin. Or more specifically to his malfunctioning usb port!

Ok...let's rewind... (are you making a rewinding sound with your mouth...? yes you are...I caught you ;0)

I get a call from Devin..."Dude..usb's on the fritz! Wanna go to the Mac store? I got an appointment with a genious!" (if you don't know what I'm talking about I urge you to get a Mac. Or you have a mac and you've never had to get service...which is more likely the case and if that's so..."MACINTOSH REPRESENT!")

But I digress..."Yo "D" I'm on it foo! I'm fixin'tah gass up the ride and I peep you in 10...Peace!" (ok sometimes I'm a little lax with my english...)

Ok...maybe fast forward a little...(I heard that...)

The main reason I wanted to go with Devin to the mall is so I can check out "The Walking Store" for shoes Devin had been raving about. He just got back from an extended trip out of the country and kept saying how much his shoes saved his feet. Well, knowing how much he walks I figured I should look into these magical shoes.

So we get to the mall with time to spare before his appt at the mac store and we head straight to the shoe store. There's not really much more to tell...I told the guy what I was looking for he brought them out, I slipped those bad boys on and all of a sudden...no pain. Perfect fit.

Keen Portsmouth

Top

Bottom

Waterproof leather upper with Secure-fit leather Achilles support.

Classic Wallabee lace design.

Leather and moisture wicking synthetic lining.

Removable multi-density metatomical cushioning footbed.

Compression molded EVA midsole.

Anti-slip, oil-resistant outsole with semi-aggressive lugs.

What can I say? Best shoes I've ever had (so far). They fit great. My foot feels sooo much better and I feel less tired after a day of walking around.

Check this link for reviews

That's about it! Maybe you have some wonder shoes that you would like to share with the group...let us know! =0)

"Would one of you please get off the scale!"

2006-10-15T01:10:00.000-07:00

I figure we can just get right to the numbers:

6/08/06
Total Weight: 527.6lbs (239.8kg)
Body Fat: 51.5% or 271.7lbs (123.5 Kg)
Fat Free Mass: 48.5% or 255.9lbs (116.3kg)

7/04/06
Total Weight: 533.8lbs (242.6kg)
Body Fat: 50.4% or 266.7lbs (121.2 Kg)
Fat Free Mass: 49.6% or 262.5lbs (119.3kg)

7/19/06
Total Weight: 532.4lbs (242.0kg)
Body Fat: 46.8% or 249.2lbs (113.3 Kg)
Fat Free Mass: 53.2% or 283.2lbs (128.7kg)

8/31/06
Total Weight: 525.6lbs (238.4 Kg)
Body Fat: 47.0% or 247.0lbs (112kg)
Fat Free Mass: 53% or 278.6lbs (126.4kg)

10/14/06

Total Weight: 519.4lbs (236.09 Kg)
Body Fat: 47% or 241.4lbs (109.73kg)
Fat Free Mass: 53% or 278.0lbs (126.36kg)

The numbers show a Total Loss of 6.2lbs
if you look at the Body fat...
on 6/08 My body fat was at 271.7 lbs
on 10/14 My Body fat is at 241.4lbs
Total fat Loss 30.3 lbs
Total lean Body gain 22.1lbs

Total loss of 6.2lbs

***********

Measurements

*********** 8/29*******10/14
Neck:**********20.75****19.75***-1.00
Upper Arm:****19.75****19.75***no change
Forearm:*******14.75****14.75***no change
Chest:**********68.50****66.50***-2.00
Waist:**********71.50****70.50***-1.00
Hip:************75.00****75.00***no change
Thigh:**********37.25***37.25***no change
Calf:************25.50***25.50***no change
Measurements are in Inches

Ok so there you have it! Finally a bit of progress! I'm hoping that my plateau is over and we can get down to some serious weight loss now..or at least when I get this sleeping thing in hand. But I'm happy with this little jump so Yay for me! I still want to focus on losing another 10 lbs by the end of the month and with my foot feeling better thanks to my new shoes (which will be the topic of my next post) I think I may even try some road walking instead of on the treadmill...maybe even a little really light jogging...10 feet here, 10 feet there...nothing big but I want to just get myself moving more.

Alright...enough about that. I'm pretty happy with this progress. I don't want to go over talking it.

In other news..I thought you all might get a kick out of this picture. Now if you've seen something like this before it may not seem odd to you but I had to do a double take and then I had to take a picture because I couldn't imagine the train of thought that brought this to be...

I mean...does one often find themselves in need of 10 pounds of Ice while in the Burger King Drive-thru? What's next? "Boy oh boy I feel like a bacon burger but the grass is looking a little brown. I only want to make one stop...I sure hope that Burger King is still offering a 10 pound bag of fertilizer at their drive-thru!"

365

2006-10-13T15:12:00.000-07:00

I've been trying to think of ways to make myself post daily and I think I may have a plan. Recently I've been using Flickr.com to store my photos online. I was looking around flickr the other day and I noticed that quite a few other flickr members were doing a project where they were taking a self portrait every day for 1 year and I thought that that would be a great idea and a great way to show my weight loss once it kicks in gear. At the end of the year I would be able to put them all in a slide show and literaly "watch my loss" lol! So starting 10/24/06 (my birthday by the way...*wink*) I will start taking a photo a day and I might also try to take a random shot of something important to me each day so that at the very least I'll have something to show you or discuss if no topics come to mind.

Check out some of the other folks on Flickr and their 365 day photo projects...

realistic goals...

2006-10-11T03:10:00.000-07:00

I know that you fine folks have been waiting for a weigh-in and I plan to get you the data by the end of the week. Yay! thanks for being so patient. The last two weeks I've been sort of lax in my work-out routine but I have been hitting the pool quite a bit and I feel that that may be at least keeping me on track. I don't know if I feel like I've lost anything substantial but I know I haven't gained anything.

This is gonna take off one day and I won't feel like I need to explain myself so much LOL!

one thing I'd like to do after the weigh-in is focus really hard on losing 10lbs by the end of the month. I think I can really do it if I focus on my pool cardio and really focus on eating even better than I have been. My first major goal has always been to get under 500 lbs and lord know what's been going on with my body these last four months but I feel like I'm on the verge of a break through of some kind. My stamina is getting better and I've found that I can really push it in the pool and I feel like I'm getting a good workout. The last time I really lost a lot of weight I did it with daily jogging but I was under 450 and my legs could take the pounding. I have a serious feeling that I'm like 40 or 50 lbs away from light jogging and when that happens I'm gonna kick this things butt so hard. First things first though...stay tuned for the weigh-in.

An artfull cure!

2006-10-06T03:32:00.000-07:00

Some of you mayh remember that Candy Minx, one of the readers (watchers) here, had started a painting some time ago intended to be sold on ebay to benefit diabetes research through my fundraising effort. Well she is finished and the painting is up on ebay for bidding at this very moment! EBAY

I want to take a moment and thank Candy Minx for her unique and wonderful creativity and for finding her own special way of contributing to my efforts to raise funds for the American Diabetes Association!

So, if you have a moment swing by her blog and she what else she's up to and post something nice to help me show my appreciation! And, don't forget to check out the auction on Ebay! Let's find this painting a good home!

Stop and smell the wild flowers...

2006-10-05T03:35:00.000-07:00

I found this thing through someone's blog and thought I'd try it out. I have to say that It's pretty damn accurate....LOL j/k anyone else think I look like Keira Knightley? ;0)

In other news some friends and I decided to go to the beach on tuesday. It was fantastic to get out of town and get lost on highway 101 with some good friends.

Road Trip! Devin, Justin and Me.
(Justin's Girlfriend Kerry is there too but I've never gotten her permission to post photo's of her)

Painter at China Camp

Takin' a moment to just be...

Kerry's collectin' sea glass

Gull...

Walking in the sand is quite the workout!

Devin sings a good-bye ukulele tune to Stinson Beach, our third and final beach of the day!

I've got to remember to do things like this more often. We all should.

To Whom It May Concern,

2006-10-03T23:30:00.000-07:00

My name is (withheld) and I joined your club about 2 weeks ago. Previously I swam for 4 years at Calif. Family Fitness. I observed somethingin the pool today, that concerned me. I am an R.N. and also a formerly mobidly obese person. I observed a trainer with a name tag (name?) helping train a morbidly obese gentleman in the pool today. He started him out running and lifting his legs and after 1 length he was so out of breath he would rest for 4-5 minutes and sprint and rest. As I was in the lane right next to him I could tell how out of breath (therefore how high his heart rate) and I became concerned that I did not observe a pulse rate being taken. The trainer would push this guy like one would push someone 200+lbs lighter in my opinion. What I know about people that big is that intense increase and sudden decrease in pulse like that could cause a heart attack - having worked in Intensive Coronary Care for many years, I have seen it before. Obviously I'm not a fitness instructor, but when I see something that seems so technically off I have to speak.

Thank you,
(name withheld)

*********************************

So, that's the letter we received. We called and spoke with her about her thoughts. Obviously the letter was written from a place of concern and as such we responded taking her concerns in mind but making sure that she knew that we had been doing this for a while and were aware of my physical limits.

I do want to correct one thing she wrote in the letter though. She stated that she observed me take one length of the pool and rest for 4-5 minutes while I caught my breath. It was more like 1 lap with a pause and then after the return lap I took maybe one and one half to two minutes break before begining the next exercise. And yes...I was quite out of breath but as we explained to her we're in the pool so that I can get my heart rate up without too much impact on my sore foot. The rest of the workout was pretty steady as far as heart rate goes but I don't think she was there for more than about 10 to 15 minutes of my 45 minute session. (I could be mistaken)

All I can say is that I do appreciate her concern and her professional opinion but in the end I kind of wish she would have just leaned over and asked if everything was ok. I really felt bad for Kendrick, my trainer. There has never been a time when he wasn't very conscious of my heavy breathing. He constantly checks on me and allows me to rest as needed and even when he pushes me he never pushes me past my limit.

I'm not sure what else to say...what are your thoughts.

"I love the pop-in!"

2006-10-03T03:30:00.000-07:00

Nothing much to report. I'm still trying to get back to posting daily and I think what I might do is post Mondays through Fridays and not post so much on the weekends when the readership is really low. I think that'll be a good balance because I think that daily posting pace (though I haven't done it in a couple of weeks) was burning me out. We'll try that for a while.

I do want to let you know to make sure to check back on Wednesday morning for my Tuesday post because I think you might find it interesting. I was working out in the pool the other day with my trainer and apparently another member thought that my trainer was forcing me to over exert myself, so much so that she went straight to the gym management and wrote out a statement to the fact. After my session my trainer was confronted with the letter and he came and spoke to me about it. We ended up calling the woman who wrote the letter and discussing it with her and she gave me permission to transcribe the letter for my journal for everyone to read. (I promised I'd leave her name off of it)

I'd do it tonight but I think I might be able to catch the ole sandman express if I close my eyes soon and I don't want to miss what little sleep i can get if I can help it.

I'll type that out tomorrow and we can discuss it if you're interested.

So, until then...sweet dreams!

Potpourri...

2006-09-29T02:14:00.000-07:00

Well hello everyone! Long time no see. I thought maybe I'd make a post so that people know I'm still alive and doin' my thing. I got a few emails concerned that I had given up and I want everyone to know that that is not the case. In fact just the opposite. I've been trying to really kick it into gear. The problem I've been having is still the sleep and it's just been hard to concentrate and I haven't felt like posting much.

Let's recap what's been going on since we last spoke...Well it's pretty much the same. I'm still working on trying to get my sleeping habits back to normal. I'm waiting to speak with a specialist about sleep disorders. In the mean time I'm going to have to tell my Dr that the last RX he gave me is just not regulating my sleep and I'm still getting 2 or so hours a night and then crashing for a day every 3 or 4 days.

On the good side I did start water cardio with my trainer and have tried a couple of times on my own and I like it quite a bit. We've decided to make our saturday workout a water day and I've tried to get into the pool at least 1 or 2 times a week outside of that.

Also, I'm going to measure and weigh in at the end of next week, for those of you who keep up on that with me. Probably Thursday or Friday depending when I can get all the numbers together for you...that should be fun ;0)

That's about it.

In other news. A long time ago I was really into Photography. Did it for a living for a while but got a little burned out. (I know...I know..."how many hobbies does this guy have...writing lame stories, making puppets, photography?") anyhoo, I used to have a really nice camera which for financial reasons I had to pawn a long while back...Don't worry it's not all that bad...I kept up with paying the interest on the loan and just the other day I was finally able to pay off the original loan and I got my camera back! For those of you 'in the know', it's a Canon 1v...the last pro 35mm film camera they made but it's super sweet and kicks alllll sorts of hind end! Wha-hoo! *Doin' a dance....shak'ah shak'ah!!* This whole blog thing has really got my creative juices flowing and I want to create...I still plan to do the podcast as soon as I start to show a steady loss (so I have something to talk about) and I still plan to get my next puppet started sometime soon and now that I have my camera back I want to start photographing local bands again. I dug up a few samples of my work for you to look at. You're welcome to let me know what you think.

Bob's Child

Brian Rogers

ALTA

I also thought I'd show you a short clip of my friend Justin Farren playing at a show I went to last weekend. Great show and great folks...I can't wait for the next one!

That's it for now...I'm drowsey but somehow wired at the same time. I'm gonna try to close my eyes and see if anything comes of it. I just hope that closet stays closed until I'm really asleep this time. I do not want to go through that again...'shivers'...

Part 2 of "It came from the closet..."

2006-09-27T02:50:00.000-07:00

hmmm...so where was I? Oh that's right! Closet door slowly opening, arm hair standing on end and the only thing between me and certain doom was a lazy-eye'd sheep named Allen. (what? I didn't name him...talk with his mother)

So there we were...Allen and me. The other 73 sheep having taken the coward's rout, ducking back into their wall hole. Come to think of it It was about then that I wish I had had the foresight to dig my own wall hole...you know, for just this type of occasion. But here I was...holeless standing behind a, possibly, imaginary sheep who didn't have the sense to abandon me like his brothers and sisters.

The door creeked as it continued to open. I thought I was going to pass out...I looked down at my feet. Allen had beat me to the punch. Bless his heart...he was all spralled out on the floor...tongue hanging out one eye closed and the lazy one still looking at the lamp.

Just then I looked up and a hand reached around the closet door gripping it in such a way as to get more leverage. It was dark but my eyes were acustomed to the light being completely dialated with fear by this point. I could make out that the hand was really big and covered with what appeared to be moles with coarse hairs protruding from them. The nails were long and jagged like something with bad teath had been chewing on them and the hand left a greasy smudge on the door as it continued to slowly push it open.

By this point my fear had surpassed my curiosity and I turned to run. Little did I know, Allen had somehow wrapped his legs around mine in terror before he passed out so I was not only tangled up in sheep but my leg had fallen asleep. (oh and yes I get the irony in that) Needless to say I fell. I must have wacked my head pretty good too because I had a good sized lump and a whopper of a headache!

The moment I got my bearings back I turned my attention back to the closet. There was nothing there... I quickly got up and rushed for the light switch. I was all alone...no sheep, no monster in the closet...nothing. Had I imagined it. No I couldn't have... Why else would I have this horrible headache and this lump on my head. I know what I saw...It was so real. By this time I had calmed down enough to at least go look in the closet. As I approached the closet door I saw it... "how could I have missed it?" I closed and rubbed my eyes just in case I was seeing things but when I opened them...there it was. As Plain as day..the huge greasy hand print. The arm hairs started to stand up again as I grabbed a near by baseball bat and flung open the closet door!! I jabbed the bat into the closet and swung it madly around hitting everything but my intended target. The closet was empty. Except for the normal closet things...coats, shoes and my trusty toboggan! As I stepped further in, just to make sure, my foot came to rest on something that sounded like paper. When I bent over to pick it up I found that it was a note scribbled out on a greasy piece of paper bag like material.

the note read...

Hello,

Do not be afraid. I am here to help. For months now I have waited quietly, each night, in your closet. I have waited patiently and quietly waiting for the perfect moment to begin my work but that moment has never come. You never sleep...and, you see, that makes it very hard for me to do my job. Tonight was a mistake. Until now I have worked in complete obscurity. No one has seen me. You almost saw me and that would have been a very bad thing. Even writing this note to you now may set in motion events that I may not be able to control. I must remember to be much more careful in the future. There's no telling what they would do if you ever had proof I exsisted. But I worry about you and I want to help you...but you never sleep. You've worked so hard and have come so far. It would be a shame for all your hard work not to pay off...it's just...you never sleep. I can't come to you if you don't sleep. so...sleep...

yours truly,
The Fat Fairy

Now. I know what you're saying. There's no such thing as a Fat Fairy. But that's just it. They don't want us to know about it but have you ever noticed how everyone always tells you to get plenty of sleep when you're trying to lose weight? Well...that has to come from somewhere. Who's to say that there's not a fat fairy? They got a tooth fairy and no one seems to question that? What if there's a fat little fairy with flappy little wings and a bucket that goes around to all the good hard working dieters at night and, while they sleep, he performs his magic lipo suction and then leaves a nickle under your pillow? All I'm saying is that it would explain a lot. I haven't slept in months and the slow fat loss. Oh and if that's not enough proof for you...I have one more bit of evidence. It seems that when I tripped and fell I knocked over my camera and it seems to have shot a frame of whatever was in my room that night. I know I didn't take it and no one else uses my camera so I can only assume that this is the only known picture of the Fat Fairy on record... It's not for the faint of heart so look if you think you can handle it...
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Fat Fairy? You be the judge

Now...remember. This is between you and me so don't go leaking the info. There's no telling what Might happen if he catches wind of this blog post. Even if he's not what he says he is...I don't want whatever's living in my closet to be mad at me...or you...

'Thump'..."Whazzat?"

2006-09-20T00:25:00.000-07:00

...so, there I was. Lying there, like so many nights that had already passed. I was tired...sooo soooo tired but sadly, sleep was not on the agenda that night. ...again.

I had just finnished counting sheep. Not that I believe in that old technique, my room was crawling with them. I'm not sure if they were a manifestation of narcoleptic hallucinations cemented in my mind by the sleep prescription cocktail which was, at that moment, doing it's level best to sneak the sandman in the back door to do his dirty work while I was distracted by the sheep...or were they getting in through the large hole in the floor board near the closet door. I've tried patching it up with duct tape and calking compound but the little buggers keep slipping through. 74 at last count. It's no wonder I don't sleep. Do you have any idea what kind of racket 74 sheep make in a small room?
Oh yeah...note to self. Let the sleeping pills know that the back door sticks a little when it's humid...he ahd the sandman should try a window.

But enough rambling. I had just corraled the last of those pesky ewes when I head a sound from the closet.

I was startled but I managed to squeek out a feeble, "hello?" You know, the kind where you want to know what just made that noise but you'd just as rather, whatever it is, not hear you at all and never make that sound again so you can just believe that you it was a figment of your sleep deprived senses...you know, that kind of hello...

I waited....nothing. I waited longer...nothing. Then, suddenly, there it was again!! "Hello!" I yelled it out this time! "Hello!!" still no answer...but I knew...and to confirm it the sheep had all stopped grazing on the carpet and were no looking directly at the closet door. Even that grey sheep with the lazy eye...well he was looking at the closet and at the lamp in the corner but it was all the proof I needed to confirm that I had not imagined the sound. I mean..if 74, possibly 'real' sheep are staring at a closet door and a lamp..well...what more evidence need you have?

"I'll give you one more chance!", I blurted, "or I'm coming in...

I stepped back. (I may be tired but I'm not stupid)

Just then...the door knob started to turn... I stepped behind the grey one with the lazy eye... I figured that with his less than perfect visual acuity he might accidentally stagger twoard 'whatever' was coming out of the closet and give me my best shot of getting away unscathed. Slowly the knob turned...then 'click'...we all heald our breath... The door slowly creeeeeeked open...73 sheep all took a step backward...1 stepped closer to the lamp (Damn bad call!)...the hair on my rams was standing on end and it took everything I had to not shove that poor little grey sheep toward the closet and run for cover. The door continued to slowly open...seconds seemed like an eternity and then....from behind the door...

(To Be Continued)

Ha...sorry folks! You'll have to tune in for the next installment in a day or two. I promise it will be worth it. I think I've found the reason for my slow fat loss but you'll have to wait for the rest of the story to find out.

In other news. The foot is feeling better. I was able to get in 1 hour on the treadmill a couple of days ago. I'm going to try to do that a couple of days a week. I would rather increase the intensity but that causes too much pain so I'll have to settle for quantity instead of quality for now.

Oh so hey! This is my gym!

I thought I'd throw in a picture of my gym for the heck of it. I know, given my posting lately, it sounds ambitious but I want to start posting more regularly and with more random photos to make it more interesting. For the time I'll weigh in once a month so In a little less than 2 weeks we'll see more measurements and scale numbers and I've decided that I'm going to hold off on any podcasts until I get under 500lbs and feel that I can consistantly weigh myself with accuracy. I wantthe podcasts to be a good experience for everyone and I feel like I'd do a better job If I had some serious loss to discuss first.

So those are my plans...That and trying to get to the bottom of my sleep issues. Thanks again for those who are sticking this out with me. Things are moving slowly but they are moving!!

Music to my ears...

2006-09-15T12:11:00.000-07:00

Well, yesterday Blogger seemed to be having server trouble so no posting for me... :0(

But! Today is a new day and we're up and running! Yay us!

So...music education. I've mentioned how important music is in my life and how I started a music education program with couple of friends a couple of years ago. Well it's not all glitz and glamour but yesterday was one of those days that makes you really appreciate the cool stuff we get to do. One of the things we do for our students is invite local musicians into the class room to share their music and experiences with the students. Yesterday my partner Clay arranged for local musician Amber Padget from the band "spider silk dresses" to play for one of our classes and I got to go hang out and watch our work in action.

Amber Padget

Amber with the class

I want to thank Amber for coming out and doing this for us. It was a great day. Amber was fantastic and the students were attentive and had several good questions for Amber about how she got started playing music and what her music meant to her. I've always thought that it's important to have musicians play for the students so that they can see the practical application of the skill they are learning.

Hellooooo nurse!

2006-09-14T02:07:00.000-07:00

Hey Ho Blogger fans! Your friendly neighborhood insomniac here trying to come up with something to write... hmmm.... well you'll be happy to know that I finally did a little shopping and got some marinade to make my chicken much better. I cooked a little up for my brother and myself tonight, threw in some pasta and a nich spinach salad with little tiny tomatoes and, if I do say so myself, it was quite good!

I know, I know...nothing original but for one who doesn't cook much it's a good start. Now I have to break out the wonderful Cookbook Talena sent to me and I'll be in business.

what else? Well...I've been resting my foot as much as possible which means little to no Cardio. I've tried the stationary bikes but because of my gut I can't quite pedal yet. But I think that soon that may be an alternative to the treadmill. If the pool is quiet enough my trainer said that he would show me some pool exercises that I can do to het my heart rate up and if that works I may try that once a week as well. I really hope this foot gets better soon so I can work out at the intensity I know I need to in order to get the most benefit. And then once I loose a bulk of weight and I can use the other tools available to me my foot can go right back to hurting if it wants...I just want like 2 months of pain free time to get on track. Well..regardless..it goes on. I'm still waiting back on news about further testing or refferrals to the appropriate departments but my behavioral specialist did call me today to get up to speed on what I discussed with my Dr so at least they're on the same page. Oddly enough It would be a huge relief to find out that I'm right. Then I would know where all this fatigue has been coming from for years and why I'm always on the verge of sleep. With the right treatment things could really be much different for me. I'd like to be able to take a long road trip and not worry about falling asleep behind the wheel and killing myself and others. Maybe I can finally go visit my brother in LA again and stop making excuses or putting it off.

Being less tired will also allow me to be more active which will help me maintain the weight loss I am able to achieve. It could have also prevented some of the weight gain...but let's not live in the past.

Ok...enough of that for now. I feel like a broken record.

Tomorrow I hope to have something new to write about. I'll put my mind on it all day and see what I come up with.

G'night all... *

A little more info...

2006-09-12T00:59:00.000-07:00

I've been racking my brain looking for the silver lining in all of this. I started this blog as a positive force and with all that's been going on with my health I sort of lost that along the way. Here's what I think...My whole goal was to lose weight and improve my overall health. I guess that getting to the bottom of why I've been experiencing this serious fatigue all these years is just a part of that quest. Of course I'm tired all the time and I can't focus on my daily routine and I know that my lack of sleep is not helping my weight loss but if this is what it's going to take for me to sit my doctors down and make them take me seriously then so be it. Then we can finally get to the bottom of it all and I get the proper treatment for each of my conditions instead of lumping everything under obesity and diabetes and hoping that they all just work out.

I saw my Internist again today and he seemed to finally listen to all my symptoms. He changed my sleeping medication and he referred me back to my behavioral medicine specialist to discuss a referral to a psychiatrist who is the most qualified to diagnose and treat Sleeping disorders. He even finally mentioned that he was not to up to date on the treatment of sleeping disorders (which to me explains why he seemed to never really acknowledge it when I mentioned my sleep attacks before). I think he hears me now.

So there's my silver lining and I plan to keep plugging along. I just have a few more factors to add to the drama of it all. Looks like it's gonna be more exciting than I had planned. yay for me... ;0)

And for those of you not familliar with NARCOLEPSY I coppied some facts for you. When I read it it was almost like some one took it all right out of my head. Now keep in mind I haven't been diagnosed by any means but I experience all of these symptoms and have for a couple of years now. I always thought it was caused by my weight and thought that I was just fat and lazy. Anyway...here you go...fun stuff huh?

http://www.narcolepsynetwork.org/faq.php

1. QUESTION: What is narcolepsy?
ANSWER: Narcolepsy is a sleep disorder of neurological origin, characterized by excessive daytime sleepiness. It can begin at any age and continues throughout life. It frequently becomes noticeable during the teens or early twenties but it can also appear later in life. Predisposition to it seems to be hereditary. It is believed to affect approximately 1:1,000 people of both sexes and all races. It is not degenerative; people with narcolepsy can expect to live a normal life span.

2. QUESTION: What are the symptoms? ANSWER: There are four primary symptoms:
[1] Excessive Daytime Sleepiness (EDS) includes daytime sleep attacks, which may occur with or without warning (and for many are irresistible); persistent drowsiness, which may continue for prolonged periods of time; and "microsleeps", or fleeting moments of sleep intruding into the waking state.
[2] Cataplexy (the other hallmark symptom of narcolepsy) is a sudden loss of voluntary muscle control, usually triggered by emotions such as laughter, surprise, fear or anger. It occurs more frequently during times of stress or fatigue. The cataplectic attack may involve only a slight feeling of weakness and limp muscles (such as sagging facial muscles, a nodding head, buckling knees, loss of arm strength, 'garbled’ speech); but it may also result in immediate total body collapse, during which the person may appear unconscious, but remains awake and alert. These attacks may last from a few seconds up to thirty minutes.
The two other symptoms are [3] hypnagogic hallucinations - vivid, realistic, often frightening dreams; and [4] sleep paralysis, or a temporary inability to move. Either one of these can occur during the process of going to sleep or waking up, while the brain is partially asleep and partially awake.

3. QUESTION: Are there other symptoms?
ANSWER: The following secondary or auxiliary symptoms may appear:
[1] Automatic behavior, the performance of a routine task, without conscious awareness of doing it, and often without later memory of it;
[2] Disrupted nighttime sleep, involving multiple arousals.
Other difficulties may be caused by the primary symptoms, appear as side effects of medication, or result from one's continuing struggle to cope. Feelings of intense fatigue and continual lack of energy are often reported, and depression is also common. The ability to concentrate and memorize may become more difficult. Vision (focusing) problems, eating 'binges', weak limbs, and difficulties in handling alcohol may also occur.

4. QUESTION: How are these symptoms all related to narcolepsy?
ANSWER: Narcolepsy is related to REM (rapid eye movement) sleep, the dreaming portion of sleep. As a protection against acting out dreams, the muscles become immobile or "paralyzed”. For the normal person, a sleep period first progresses for about 90 minutes of non-REM sleep and then REM sleep begins. But for a person with narcolepsy, sleep begins almost immediately with REM sleep. Since the brain may not be totally asleep when dreaming begins, the dream is sometimes experienced far more vividly and is thought of as a hallucination. After waking, REM periods, or fragments of REM, occur inappropriately throughout the day. This explains excessive daytime sleepiness. Cataplexy is related to the muscle "paralysis" of REM. When automatic behavior occurs, sleep has partially overtaken the brain, but the body continues to perform familiar tasks.

5. QUESTION: Is narcolepsy a psychological or mental disorder?
ANSWER: Narcolepsy is a neurological disorder. Medical researchers have recently identified the cause as the absence of a neurotransmitter, normally present in the hypothalamus region of the brain, which produces the hypocretin peptide essential to the human sleep-wake cycle. Nevertheless, psychological problems can develop from misunderstanding of and difficulty in coping with the symptoms. A very difficult fact to understand for one with narcolepsy and those around him or her, is that sleepiness and sleep attacks are uncontrollable. Failure to accept this may seriously influence self-esteem or personal relationships. Health care counseling for persons and families with narcolepsy can help alleviate these secondary problems. Educating the public, especially school, health, and human resource personnel can help lessen or prevent many other problems.

6. QUESTION: Does narcolepsy affect learning?
ANSWER: Although narcolepsy does not directly affect one's intelligence, learning and education cannot help but be affected by the symptoms. Study, concentration, memory, and attention span may be periodically impaired by sleep. Children with narcolepsy should be identified at the earliest possible age to avoid lowered self-esteem and a pattern of failure adjustments in learning habits may be continually necessary. This can be accomplished with the cooperation of school personnel.

7. QUESTION: Is cataplexy dangerous?
ANSWER: Mild cataplexy, while perhaps embarrassing, is not dangerous. One can often find support for weakened head, neck, or arm muscles, so that others may not even be aware of the momentary loss of control. However, severe cataplexy, resulting in immediate and sudden body collapse, can be dangerous. Companions should be told in advance what to expect and how to help. They should always check for the person's safety and comfort immediately relieving any unnatural bending of limbs or unusual body positions, assuring complete relaxation, and then allowing him or her to recover spontaneously. Cataplexy for others can be so instantaneous that there is no time to prepare for safety and serious injury can occur. Some deaths and near-deaths have been reported. Obviously, potentially life-threatening situations should be avoided unless cataplexy is controlled.

8. QUESTION: How is a diagnosis of narcolepsy determined?
ANSWER: Excessive daytime sleepiness (EDS) is often the first symptom to appear, and for some, the ONLY symptom of narcolepsy. However, it is also a symptom of various other medical conditions. Cataplexy, on the other hand, is almost unique to narcolepsy. The combination of EDS and cataplexy allow clinical diagnosis of narcolepsy, but the presence of cataplexy is not required for a diagnosis of narcolepsy.
In most cases, laboratory tests are still needed to confirm diagnosis and determine a treatment plan. The usual procedure includes an overnight polysomnogram (PSG) at a sleep disorders center to determine the presence of EDS and perhaps other underlying causes of this symptom. This is followed by the Multiple Sleep Latency Test (MSLT) which measures sleep onset and how quickly REM sleep occurs. The MSLT is the most widely accepted diagnostic test for narcolepsy.
Finally, a genetic blood test has been developed which measures certain antigens often found in people who have a predisposition to narcolepsy. Positive results suggest but do not prove narcolepsy. This test is sometimes used when the diagnosis is in question.

9. QUESTION: How is narcolepsy treated?
ANSWER: The goal is to increase daytime alertness and to lessen recurring cataplexy, using minimal medication. Excessive Daytime Sleepiness (EDS) and cataplexy are treated separately. Traditionally, central nervous system stimulants (e.g. Ritalin, Dexedrine) have been used for EDS. In 1999, Provigil (modafinil) was approved as the first non-amphetamine wake-promoting drug for EDS. Tricyclic antidepressants and serotonin reuptake inhibitors (e.g. Vivactil, Tofranil) have been used for cataplexy and REM symptoms. A new drug, Xyrem (gammahydroxybutyrate) is being studied in FDA clinical trials.* Preliminary results suggest it is both safe and effective for these symptoms.
In addition to drug therapy, 2 or 3 short naps during the day help to control sleepiness and maintain alertness. Proper diet and regular exercise also help. And some report benefits from alternative remedies, such as herbs, phosphates, and acupuncture.
Continuing doctor-patient communication is necessary. Equally important is educating one’s family, friends, teachers, and co-workers about narcolepsy. Joining a support group is recommended.

Insomnia and beyond...

2006-09-10T02:38:00.000-07:00

Ok so the insomnia class pretty much gave me information that I already knew or that you fine folks had suggested in your posts. It did however teach me to set my alarm for the same time every morning including days off and to get up no matter how tired I am and to start setting my bed time at 4 hours before my alarm and increase the length of time by 15min over the course of a couple of weeks untill I get the desired amount of sleep. Also I bought a fan to get the air circulating in my room better wich is something I've always had but when I moved into the house we have celing fans and I thought that would be enough but it hasn't been. I have the new fan on right now and already feel a difference.

Now the interesting news. I was speaking with the teacher of the class after it was over and I was telling him about my experience with insomnia and how I was not only getting 2 to 3 hours of sleep a night or every other night but how I was experiencing sleep attacks during the day as well. These episodes last maybe 2 to 3 minutes but happen several times a day. I think I even fell asleep 3 or 4 times during the 1 1/2 hour class. It's been this way for a while...even before I started having trouble sleeping. While I'm moving I'm fine but the moment I stop and sit down for a few moments I enevitably fall asleep...my head starts to nod and my eyes get really heavy and I fall asleep. Usually my snoring wakes me up within a minute or two or I drift in and out for several minutes. It happens almost anywhere...the worst is sitting in my car. While I don't have too much trouble driving because my mind is engaged...I may get tired but I stay allert...but after I park, if I don't get out of the car right away I'm fair game for a little snooze. Movies, parties (even the loud ones...If I sit on a comfy couch it's good night sally) music shows. It's gotten to the point that I can't read because I doze off every few moments and drop the book. Now granted it's worse since I developed insomnia but it's been with me for a couple of years.

And if that weren't worrisome enough on rare occasions when sitting or lying in certain positions I have a certain type of episode that includes paralysis. My head drops forward. I usually bite my tongue and while I'm conscious I can't move for a few moments and it takes all my concentration to lift my head and pull out of it. Like I said these are rare and only occur in very specific situations. Anyway...my point is that the dr who was teaching the class suggested that I might be dealing with Insomnia and Narcolepsy which would explain the constant fatigue I feel and have felt for years.

In any case I plan to try to see my Dr on monday or tuesday and start looking into testing or treatment. I just hope he takes it more seriously this time then when I've mentioned it in the past.

**************************************

Today's food:

I woke up late and had to go straight to the gym and all I was able to eat later was my usuall Togo's Turkey Sandwich.
of course water and my evening vitamins

Workout:

Inclined sit-up into a squat w/ knee lift: 3 sets / 12 reps 2x15 reps

Inclined bench press 135lbs: 3 sets 15 reps

steps, One foot on the step and bring the other foot up: 3 sets each leg / 20 reps

Treadmill: 15min

Ok let's get this rolling again...

2006-09-08T11:29:00.000-07:00

Hello friends! I know that I've been slacking on this blog and I know this thing is not going to work unless I stick with it and post daily. The last couple of weeks have felt like a wave of set backs from my horrible insomnia to my foot pain and over all lack of interest in posting but I realize that the only way to pull me out of my funk is to plug on through and get back on track. I figure, at least that way I'll still be working toward my goal and I won't be behind when my head quits conspiring against me and lets me get some serious and sustained sleep.

I don't know how much sense that makes..my head is really groggy right now and pretty much all the time anymore. I also seem to be typing with one eye closed...lol wonder what that's all about?.

Later today I have my frist Insomnia class and I really hope that I learn something new because I can't take this anymore. One of my Dr's told me that the class has a 85% success rate so that's promising.

now about the blog...I think I've said this before, recently but I mean it this time...I plan to start posting daily again starting today. I'll let you know about the class and I think My Dr is going to Rx a different medication to help me sleep because the last one made me sleep for nearly 20 hrs and left me really groggy...almost what I imagine being hung over would be...keeping in mind I don't drink and don't know what that feels like...

Anyway...I'll let you know if there are any great revelations with regard to the class. I'm keeping my thumbs crossed...wish me luck.

short note...

2006-09-02T13:59:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone! I wanted to thank everyone for the amazing support after my last post. I was feeling really down but you guys picked me right up. My schedule has made it difficult to post but I working on that so that I can get back on track with my daily posts. I will respond to everyone who posted next time I'm on line which seems like it will be tomorrow morning. I'm going to the gym in a moment and then right to an Early labor Day party and don't plan to be home early enough to post tonight...gotta live ya know. Anyway...Thanks again. You have no idea how much your encouragement has helped!

Sean

As Promised...

2006-08-31T20:17:00.000-07:00

OK here we go. It's been aprox 3 months now and I've been plugging away with my diet and my workouts like a trooper. I'm going to say right off that I'm still highly motivated. I am encouraged by some things however I'm also slightly concerned about some areas of slow to nonexistent progress.

Let's start with the numbers.

6/08/06
Total Weight: 527.6lbs (239.8kg)
Body Fat: 51.5% or 271.7lbs (123.5 Kg)
Fat Free Mass: 48.5% or 255.9lbs (116.3kg)

7/04/06
Total Weight: 533.8lbs (242.6kg)
Body Fat: 50.4% or 266.7lbs (121.2 Kg)
Fat Free Mass: 49.6% or 262.5lbs (119.3kg)

7/19/06
Total Weight: 532.4lbs (242.0kg)
Body Fat: 46.8% or 249.2lbs (113.3 Kg)
Fat Free Mass: 53.2% or 283.2lbs (128.7kg)

8/31/06
Total Weight: 525.6lbs (238.4 Kg)
Body Fat: 47.0% or 247.0lbs (112kg)
Fat Free Mass: 53% or 278.6lbs (126.4kg)

The numbers show a Total Loss of 2lbs
but if you look at the Body fat...
on 6/08 My body fat was at 271.7 lbs
on 8/31 My Body fat is at 247lbs
Total fat Loss 24.7 lbs
Total lean Body gain 22.7lbs

Total loss of 2lbs

***********

Measurements

I didn't take any measurements until 8/3/06 so I don't have the over all changes but here's what I have for the last month:
*********** 8/3*******8/29
Neck:**********21.5******20.75**-0.75
Upper Arm:****21.5******19.75**-1.75
Forearm:*******15.25*****14.75**-0.50
Chest:**********69.5******68.5****-1.00
Waist:**********74********71.5****-2.50
Hip:************75********75******-0.00
Thigh:**********38.25*****37.25***-1.00
Calf:************25.5******25.5****-0.00
Measurements are in Inches

Pictures

Like the numbers show, there has not been too much change. Sloooooooow start. lucky me...

Biggest change I've seen is in the shoulder definition area. I seem to be losing the most weight in the upper back and shoulder area.

Ok..here's the deal. I'm not in the best mood over these results. I don't want to have to spend 3 hours crunching numbers in order to squeeze out something that resembles a good result. I want to sit down at my computer and say "hey..I lost 5 lbs, or hey...gained a pound this week but I'm back on track."

Three months in, working out 5 to 6 days a week and I'm just tired. That and I stepped in a hole today and screwed up my foot even worse. Tomorrow's another day but Today I'm tired...

August 28, 2006 Meals and 28 and 29 Workout

2006-08-30T04:31:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: protine shake

Meal 2: skipped

Meal 3: togo's large Turkey Sandwich

meal 4: stir-fry chicken and veggies over rice

Water and Vitamins

*******************************************

8/28 workout

Crunches holding 10 lb weight over head: 3 sets, 20 reps

Seated rows: 165lbs 3 sets, 15 reps

Benchpress: 135lbs 3 sets 10 reps

Treadmill: 45min

8/29 workout

Standing pull-ups on lowered bar: 3 sets, 15 reps

Standing straight arm pull downs: (unknown weight) 3 sets, 12 reps

Crunches holding 10 lb weight over head, alternating left and right sides: 3 sets, 20 reps (10 each side)

Seated squats w/ knee lift upon standing: 3 sets, 20 reps (this kicked my butt)

Treadmill: 25 min

August 26, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-27T01:47:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: skipped

Meal 2: protein Shake

Meal 3: large Subway Chicken teriaki Sandwich on Wheat roll, lettuce and pickles, mayo, bottle of sobe lean

Meal 4: Roasted Turkey breast, mashed potatos, small amount of gravey, Garden Salad and whole wheat roll

water and vitamins

****************************************

Workout:

Standing pushups on a lowered bar: 3 sets 15 reps

"gimmie my rope back" pulling against resistance band while creating large figure "8" motion: 3 sets 12 reps each direction

Balance and core workout: holding resistance band, lean forward while standing on one foot and pull back band until standing upright: 3 sets 10/15/15 reps

Squats using ball between back and wall for support: 3 sets 15/15/20 reps

Treadmill: 25 min

August 25, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-26T06:13:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Slept in

Meal 2: protein Shake

Meal 3: Large Togo's turkey sandwich, whole wheat roll, lettuce, tomato, mustard, mayo

Meal 4: Small Subway chicken teriaki sandwich on whole wheat roll, small bag of baked potato chips

Water and vitamins

********************************************

no trainer day:

Treadmill: 35min
Crunches holding 10lb weight above my head: 3 sets 20 reps
Benchpress: 135lbs 3 sets
seated rows: 3 sets 15 reps

August 24, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-25T01:39:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: slept in

Meal 2: Protein Shake, peanut butter on 2 slices of whole wheat bread, 1 apple

Meal 3: Chicken Breast Sandwich, lettuce, Tomato, Mayo

Meal 4: Grilled Chicken Breast, Salad and mixed veggies

Water and Vitamins

********************************************

Workout:

Crunches holding 10lb ball over my head: 3 sets 20 reps
Steps holding 12lb barbells lifting them alternately while steping up: 3 sets 10/12/15 reps

Squat/lift w/ 10lb ball: 3 sets 20 reps
(not sure what to call this) one armed pull down: 3 sets 15 reps 60lbs

Treadmill: 25min

Bits of tid...

2006-08-24T01:56:00.000-07:00

Ok! First...for those who've been asking. I know it's been a while and I want you to know I hear ya...I pledge (and I want you to hold me to this) to weigh in on 8/31/06! That's one week from today. I will also take some new pictures and post some more full body shots from the same day as my profile picture for comparison. And if that weren't enough I took some measurements with my trainer about 2 to 3 weeks ago and I will post those and have some new ones taken...so...1 week from today! I know you can wait!

next...Jared Fogal...

My brother, P, from new York sent me the link to a radio interview with Jared (from Subway) and I must say I have a new found respect for him. Not that I didn't respect him for what he did and I would jump at the chance for an endorsement deal like the one he pulled off but let's face it the guy can come off as a little goofy at times. Listening to him speak about his experiences from a personal perspective, however, gave me a little more insight into Jared the man and I don't see that much difference between him and myself...well except for my striking good looks. ;0) Well, that and he's reached his goal and I'm still on the path. I'll give you the link if you're interested...I encourage you to check it out.

Jared Interview

There is something else that became more clear while listening to Jared speak about his experience...he mentioned that at his largest he was wearing 60in pants waist and a 6x shirt. I thought to myself..hey that's what I wear...then he mentioned that at his heaviest he weighed 425 lbs....which got me thinking...I weigh 100lbs more than he did and we wear the same sized clothes...It just confirmed to me what I had always thought to be the case...that I may look big but I carry my weight in such a way that I look quite a bit smaller than I really am...at least 50 to 100 less...
When I do finally loose the 250lbs I'm gonna be a dead sexy beast! Look out ladies...

.....uh yeah...I don't know what that means... ;0)

August 23, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-24T01:40:00.000-07:00

Woke up pretty late so I only got 2 meals in today. Joping to do better tomorrow as i plan to force myself to get up by 8am.

Meal 3: chicken breast sandwich, whole wheat roll, lettuce, tomato, mayo, mustard, bottle sobe lean

Meal 4: chicken, rice, bean burrito w/ hand full of corn chips and salsa

Water and vitamins

*******************************************

30min on treadmill

Crunches: 3 sets 20 reps w/ 45 lb weight plate

Bench Presses: 3 sets 12 reps 135 lbs

Rows: 3 sets 15 reps 150lbs

'Back again back again jiggity-jig!'

2006-08-23T02:04:00.000-07:00

Well...what was that all about?

Sorry 'bout that folks. I just spent the last week sick and thought I'd use the time to work on my insomnia a bit as well so I just shut down everything and hybrinated! I'm still batteling the insomnia for the moment but I feel much better and I'm ready to get back to business.

As far as the past week goes, I missed 4 or 5 days of gym time but I also hardly ate anything so I think there was fairly little damage done. I feel like I lost a little muscle tone (boy that happens fast) but I've been back to the gym 3 days now and things are about back to normal so I'll start making my daily diet and workout posts again on wednesday for those who follow that sort of thing. I do think I'm going to cut some of the carbos a little more though. We'll see how that goes. I still have to get some food shopping done as well so wish for inspiration and maybe the menu will reflect it.

If I still have any readers...I love you for sticking with me. My goals haven't changed one bit! It'll take more than a little sleeplesness and a cold to block my path. We've got a long road ahead of us so let's get back on it!

********************

If you'll all indulge me for a moment I thought I'd try something. Having a blog with even a small readership has a way of creating a little bit of a minor celebrity status for a blogger and if your name shows up on search engines enough you draw the attention of all sorts of people...sometimes people you used to know but have lost touch with...I thought I'd give something a shot and see if it works...

Carrie? If you read this and feel like it, drop me an email...I'd love to know how you're doing. I hope you're well.

ukefoo@earthlink.net

...I guess we'll see...

recent lack of posts

2006-08-16T02:10:00.000-07:00

hello folks!

As some of you have noticed I haven't posted regularly in the last few days. I plan to try to get that back on track wednesday but because of my horrible insomnia and a cold that I just picked up I haven't felt very creative or social. Just to let you know everything is still on track diet wise although my eating times have been weird because of my sleep patterns and a couple of days I only really got 1 meal in. My workouts have been ok... I had to skip sunday because I did not sleep all saturday night and was trying to force myself to not nap so that I would sleep sunday night. I did get back in on monday and got in 1/2 hour on the treadmill and 100 crunches. Unfortunately I had to skip tuesday's trip to the gym because I caught a cold (probably from the gym). I will be trying to get in on wednesday for a simple workout just to try to keep on track.

I want to thank everyone for bearing with me! Like I said I should be back to regular posts on wednesday. :0)

I've got prune hands!

2006-08-13T03:58:00.000-07:00

First things first! I want to thank one of the posters here for the latest contribution to my Diabetes fundraiser!

Wizie was kind enough to make a very genreous donation to help fund diabetes research and I want to take this opportunity to thank her for helping me reach one of my goals! Thanks you from my heart!

************************************
One of the little effects of having such horrible insomnia has been a few late trips to the gym. Now I know I should be home trying to sleep but sometimes you just have to get out and do something...anything. Friday night was just this type of occasion. I ended up at the gym with a lot of energy to burn and it was late enough so that the place was pretty empty. I got done with my treadmill and my crunches and some weights and decided that if I was going to get over my nervousness about swimming in public now was my perfect opportunity. I had some shorts in the car and a clean t-shirt so I got changed and slipped into the pool. As I lowered myself in I thought back and realized that I had not accutually been in a pool for at least 15 years and all because of my weight and the negative self image it has caused. I quickly remembered why I liked swimming so much and ended up lounging around in the water for about 2 hours. The sheer enjoyment of near weightlessness alone was worth it. Every bone in my body was relieved of the stress that over 500 lbs places on it 24 hours a day. It was pretty amazing. I must say though, it was far too easy to get used to the feeling. The moment I got out of the water I really felt every ounce of the weight that I carry. It was nothing less than crushing. For a moment I wondered how I could ever carry that much weight because it felt like the weight of the world and I honestly worried that my body wouldn't recover and accept it's burden... It took me at least 10 minutes until my body got used to it again.

All in all it was a good experience and I think that i'll be able to swim around friends the next time the occasion calls for it. I'm glad I did it but it did serve to remind me that I have a long way to go and another reason to get there.

August 12, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-13T03:48:00.000-07:00

Today was really simple. I woke up at about 6pm in the evening after catching up on some very much needed sleep and I went out and did 45 on the treadmill and then got a small Togo's turkey sandwich for dinner. um...yeah.

Sunday I plan to go shopping so my menu next week should reflect that and It will probably be a little more diverse.

August 11, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-12T18:55:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: again slept through

Meal 2: protein shake

Meal 3: turkey sandwich on whole wheat bread w/ watermellon cubes

Meal 4: large turkey sandwich from Togo's on whole wheat roll, bottle of sobe lean, apple

Went to the movies, had a small popcorn no butter

water and vitamins

***************************************************

workout:
(trainer out of town until a week from this coming tuesday so I'm on my own for a while)

Treadmill: 45min

Crunches: 5 sets 20 reps w/ 35 lbs of extra weight

Seated Presses: w/ 135lbs: 3 sets 12 reps

Lounged in the pool for 2 hours

August 10, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-11T04:56:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: stayed in bed trying to get some sleep...

Meal 2: half a large togo's turkey sandwich like I like it...

Meal 3: second half of sandwich w/ apple and bottle of sobe lean

Meal 4: Chicken breast sandwich on whole wheat roll, lettuce, tomato, mayo, mustard

I'm very proud of myself. I went to see Justin and Brian play a show at the Nevada County Fair and I avoided all of the normal Fair Food...Let me tell you It was hard not to wolf down a couple of corndogs and other assorted meat on a stick!

Water and Vitamins

**********************************************************

Workout:
Series 1:

Standing pushups (bar placed slightly above my knees and pushing completely off of the bar at the top of each pushup) 3 sets 15 reps
Squats assisted by horizontal bar same height as for pushups: (one leg on 6 in step and pushing up on the elevated leg so that the other foot in off the ground at the top of the squat) 3 sets 12 reps

bench press:
135lbs 1 sets 15 reps
155lbs 2 sets 12 reps w/ assistance

August 9, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-10T03:24:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Slept in

Meal 2: protein Shake

Meal 3: Small togo's turkey sandwich, whole wheat roll, mayo, mustard, lettuce, pickles, tomato w/ Apple and bottle of sobe lean

Meal 4: green salad w/ half sliced turkey breast, vinegret dressing

Water and Vitamins

************************************

workout:

Treadmill 45min

(light day)

Major break through!!

2006-08-09T04:05:00.000-07:00

I'm about to completely blow your mind with this one! Are you ready?

I Sean Steven Perkey (Yeah that's right "Steven"), on this very day... bent over and...(are you sure you're ready...cause I can hold on and let you leave the room or cover your eyes or something)....

"I bent over and picked up a quarter!!...right off the ground!! without even thinking about it!!" Isn't that Amazing? *doing a victory dance while waving a quarter in the air singing...* " I got da quarter..da shiny quarter and I'm gonna spendit all...gonna spend up all my quarrrrterrrrr!!"

Oh...I guess it bares mentioning that until today and for a long time I have not been able to reach the ground from a standing positon let alone reach it with enough manual dexterity to pick up a coin. I guess that little bit of info is important to the story.. :0)

ok that's it. Just wanted to share...now I'm gonna go to sleep and dream about all the things that i can buy with my new quarter...ahhhh...5 sugar free gum balls...mmmmm....1 game credit on the old centipede video game at the corner quickie market (rock!)...day old bagel...mmmmmmm

I love my quarter <3

August 8, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-09T03:31:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake and 1 Apple

Meal 2: skipped

Meal 3: turkey sandwich on whole wheat bread w/ lettuce mustard and mayo, 1 apple

Meal 4: chicken breast sanwich, whole wheat roll, fresh spinach, mustard, mayo,

Water, Vitamins

********************************

Workout:

seated rows: (unsure of weight) 3 sets 15 reps
seated squats w/ dumbells (light weight) dumbells pressed above head upon standing and raising alternating leg: 3 sets 12 reps (10 reps on first set)

standing rows: (Unkown weight): 2 sets 15 reps
wood chop w/ 10lb medicine ball: 2 sets 10 reps
Side step w/ feet tethered together by resistance band: 2 sets (10 steps to the left and 9 step to the left

treadmill: 15min

August 7, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-08T03:30:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: protine shake

Meal 2: small bag of peanut, rasin,sunflowersead sun flowerseed trail mix (bottle of sobe lean)

Meal 3: Turkey sandwich, w whole wheat bread, lettuce and tomato, mayo and mustard and an apple

Meal 4: Grilled, chicken breast sandwich, white bun, w, lettuce, mayo and mustard

Water and vitamins

*************************************

Workout:

Treadmill: 45 min

Bench Press: 3 sets 12 reps 135lbs

Crunches: 5 sets 20 reps w/ 35 lb plate on chest

(post to come soon. Still not sleeping at all... workin' on it... *sigh*)

Weekend recap and Brain hijinks

2006-08-06T23:16:00.000-07:00

Hello again!
the weekend is over and I just want to sort of recap because I didn't get a chance to post for yesterday.
I got out of town a little this week end and was able to spend some time with my Father and his wife and my brothers from NY and LA. I don't really feel like doing a detailed food post for 2 days but let me just say that I kept to my basic food schedule although I had a long drive on Saturday so I did drink some diet pepsi and a diet redbull because driving alone makes me a little sleepy sometimes and I didn't want to die in a firey wreck of fire and twisted chevy malibu maxx! Oh and ditch. I did also have a piece of peach pie that my father's wife made and it was scrumptious and no you can not have any because my brothers took the rest of it to L.A.

I am happy to note that I was able to find a 24hour Fitness down the street from my father's home so my brother D and I went in for a work out. I was able to get in my 45 min on the treadmill and 100 crunches (w/35lbs of weight). We also saw a pro basketball player taking advantage of the B-bal court for some extra practice time. My brother suggested that I tell him about my blog....I decided not to...

I did, however, take today off. I'm really chomping to get back into the gym tomorrow right after work. I just think my body needs a rest. My foot really hurt a lot over the weekend and I was hobbling so much that I kept thinking to myself that no one is going to believe that I put as much time into the gym as I say I do because it looks like I can hardly walk a couple feet. I mean seriously, I walk like an old man. I've found that even though my foot may hurt during normal activity, once I get on the treadmill it only takes about 5 minutes before it warms up and stops hurting so I guess I may not be able to walk down my front steps but 45min on the treadmill is no trouble...go figure.

Ok...

The brain.

It's a tricky little bastard. It basically runs everything. Bodily functions, emotions, perception... but the brain for all it's power is not the most responsible or trustworthy organ in the body. Ok take the bladder for instance. There is one organ who, when working properly, will never let you down. If it's empty then life is grand and you can do whatever you please. Jump up and down on a trampoline if you like. If it's full you're the first one to know and as soon as you take the needed action you're right back on that pogo-stick or what have you. Your eyes...will never lie to you...wait...I know what you're gonna say but you're wrong the eyes (again if functioning properly) don't lie but the brain can monkey with info and it'll do what it wants when it wants because it's the brain "damn it" and it's in charge.

Case in point. I know I'm fat. Fatty fatty two by four...something 'bout a bathroom door. But I don't always feel it. No. I don't. I don't know if it's my brain's attempt at protecting my feelings or if it's my brain's idea of a little joke. You ask a lot of large people and I bet that they will tell you the same thing. Personally (and please make sure there are no brains in the room when you read this....are they gone?....good) Personally I think it's some sort of a conspirasy. To what end I do not know but I think the brains must be plotting or there is some kind of cosmic inside joke that we're not privy to but here's what I know... I walk around all day feeling normal. I feel great, for the most part. Strutting around feeling attractive and charming. And the reason I think it's a conspiracy is that other people willmost often treat you exactly how you perceive yourself at that moment...so the brains must be sending out little waves to other brains with messages that say things like...

"pssssst...just play along..i've got this fool feeling pretty good about himself right now so don't mess it up...if you're a girl brain make your host smile at him...make him feel even better...yeah that's it...he's feeling good now...if you're a guy brain make your host look him right in the eye and give him a good nod, that's the universal sign of manly approval...that's it! Now he feels powerfull...HaHa! But don't go too far away because you're gonna want to watch this. I'm about to pull the rug out from under his feet when I make him walk past this full length mirror! HAHA Gottcha Fatty!!!"

And that that exact moment reality snaps you in the ass with a wet towel and all that built up self respect drains out of you faster than, well, something that's slower than how fast the self respect drains out of you under such circumstances.

Then there you are loooking straight at reality through your truth-telling eyes with the faint sound of laughter somewhere deep in your subconscious. Then the cycle starts all over again. And the messed up part...the really truely screwed up part of it is that you don't really have to have anything wrong with you for your brain to pull off that trick.

Funny huh?

Last bit...

Mirrors. Personally I avoid them unless it's face high and then, you know....well look at me...I'm gorgeous... j/k
I avoid them unless I know the mirror is at the right angle because I know exactly at which angles I'm able to view myself that won't trigger self loathing. Random glances are avoided at all costs. Let me tell you how bad this can get. When I walk by a large window or mirror, the side of my body (especially my face) will acctually increase in temprature with the fear that I may glimpse myself. How sick is that. When I go to the movies (and I love the movies) I have to be carefull how I stand in the lobby due to the freaking fun house-esq decor they have in there with all the mirrors. Now I realize that people go to the movies on dates but my God...the last thing I want to see before I buy my popcorn is my ample face looking back at myself from over the counter because once again the theatre believed that the concession line would be another good place for people to Once again check their lipstic or their..I dunno, what? chest hair motif before going into a dark room for a couple of hours where you can't see a damn thing anyway!

Well enough of that. As fun as it was to get it off my chest. I hope your week if fruitfull or at the very least devoid of conspiracy driven brains hell bent on pulling the rug out from under you when you're on top of the world!

Please, also, take a moment and swing by my good friend "The Eye's" blog and congratulate him on the birth of his brand new baby girl Sophia! The new father hasn't posted yet but his mother was kind enough to share the good news! Congrats EYE! I wish all the best of love and life for you and your growing family!

August 4, 2006 Meals and Workout & little note

2006-08-05T04:08:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake (yum)

Meal 2: Turkey sandwich on Whole Wheat bread, lettuce, tomatoe, slice of cheese, mayo, mustard/ bowl of watermellon cubes

Meal 3: Chicken breast sandwich on wheat roll, lettuce, tomato, mayo, mustard/ bottle of sobe lean

Meal 4: Chicken breast, small mixed green salad, small slice of tri-tip beef, 2 slices of salami, 2 slices of cheese, 2 crackers, 10 m&m's

water and vitamins

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Workout:

no trainer today

treadmill: 45 min

Crunches: 2 sets 20 reps w/ 35 lbs weight (had to cut short, was running late to friend's birthday party)
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On Saturday I will be out of town visiting my father and 2 brothers that live in L.A. and NY so I'll be missing my regular training session woth kendrick but I plan to find a 24hr fitness there so I can get in some cardio and a basic workout.

I also plan to put off today's post until i get home saturday night because it's late and I'm about to crash.

G'night folks! Sweet dreams!

Cardio....ugh...

2006-08-04T02:05:00.000-07:00

Ok so I've made a decission to force myself to do more cardio in an effort to jumpstart my metabolism. I'll let you know right off though that I hate walking or jogging for exercise. My parents used to make me do it when I was younger and it seemed more like punishemnt than like exercise so I have a bit of a mental block with regards to it. (Dad. If you're reading this..no hard feelings really i just grew to dislike it and am trying to find ways to do it until I'm fit enough to include other types of cardio in my workout plan)

You may remember that I first tried listening to music to get me through my cardio sessions but I soon found out that my mind still wanders and the more my mind wanders the more I think about what I'm doing and how much I hate it. I start thinking about all the discomfort and breathing etc. and I tend to wear myself out in about 15 minutes and if I can get in 1/2 hour it's a miracle.

Well I think I truly found the secret this time but it makes my workout much more complicated. Television. That's right the ole Boob-Tube! I've found that I have to be totally emersed both visually and audibly. But here's the rub. At my gym they have televisions but you have to have an fm radio inorder to receive the proper channel's sound. I have NO radio. I have an iPod which can be converted to an fm radio but I'm not wanting to ssopend the $50 or so to buy the device. And I suppose I could just buy a radio too but I don't wanna.

So on days when I don't see my trainer I've been going to another 24hr fitness across town where they, not only have several more tvs and a plug on the treadmill handle where you can tune the TV sound for the partiular screen and channel that you want to watch. I find if I get a good show I can walk for a long time without even thinking about it. So, when I'm done I really feel like I've acomplished something.

Today was the first time that I decided to try going to my trainer at one gym and then driving across town to the other gym for cardio.

Positives first.. I did it. I worked out with Kendrick then I shot on over to the other sight and got through another 1/2 hour of cardio.
negatives: takes alot of time and cooling off after my main workout on the way to the othr gym makes for a lot of pain that generaly goes away after a few minutes on the treadmill.

I don't know if I'll continue to go to the other gym on the same day that I viit my trainer. I may just end up getting a cheap radio so I can use their tv set up. I do, however like the change of scenery so I probably will continue to go to the second gym on my days off.

August 3, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-04T00:51:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake and 1 apple

Meal 2: Bowl hearty Chicken soup with vegitables 2/ slices of whole wheat bread

Meal 3: McDonalds Chicken breast sandwich, whole wheat roll, lettuce, mayo and mustard/ small fries

Meal 4: Small Togos turkey sandwich, whole wheat roll, lettuce, mayo and mustard

water and vitamins

**************************************

Workout: (short due to time constraints)

Inclined Bench Presses: 3 sets 12 reps 135lbs
side step up and reach across body w/ 6 lb medicine ball: 3 sets 10 reps each leg

Treadmill: 32 minutes

Nourishing Traditions

2006-08-03T02:58:00.000-07:00

I love getting things in the mail so today was a good day in my book! Today I received a wonderful gift from an extra generous "watcher" named Talena Winters. As Talena's blog bio reveals she is a wife a mother of 3 boys under 3 an artist, musician and she's writing the next great Canadian Musical! On top of all that she has time to blog about her exploits and send people, in far away lands, fantastic cookbooks so that they can be more healthy and make better food choices. I don't know how she does it! Honestly! I can''t find time to get in 4 square meals on a daily basis and she got all of that going on? Are the clocks different in Canada? I mean are there like 47 hours in a day up there? lem'e'see...half the distance to the north pole...square the hypotenuse...carry the one...dang! I'm gonna have to take off my other shoe...aaaaand ad the vector... Nope same 24 hours! What's you're secret?

Well while we're waiting for her answer check out her blog here Winters Day In.
The book she sent me is Nourishing Traditions written by Sally Fallon w/ Dr. Mary G. Enig Ph.D. It's a cookbook! From what I've read so far it's not just a cook book but a book full of good old, time tested nutritional information mixed in with tastey recipes that appear easy to make. The book goes into how foods work together to promote good health and lays down the straight skinny on the body's need for the proper fats in natural foods! All in all it looks like a keeper. I can't wait to try some of these and I'll let you know when I do!
Thank you Talena! A very thoughtful gift!

I should also point out that I've finished the supply of Nature Greens that Ryan Kiel from Vibrant Living sent me about a month ago and I'll be posting a review in a day or so.

other than that what's to report? Still batteling this insomnia but I've spoken with my Drs and they've given me some really good pointers so hopfully in a few days I'll have the situation under control. I've completed my original package of sessions with my trainer and will be signing on for more so that we can keep trying to crack the code my body seems to have put on the fat vault. All the signs are there as far as fat loss goes. I feel stronger. Clothes fit better and my stamina is getting better....I was able to get in 45 minutes on the treadmill today and 100 crunches. I caught a glimpse of myself today in a full length window and I can't say that I see it yet but I'm not worried because...What do we say? "I'm not done yet"...that's the affirmation...anytime I get discouraged I simply remimd myself that "I'm not done yet" and I realize that there is no need to worry because it's all part of the process...

ok folks...off to sleep. g'night.

August 2, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-03T02:46:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake

Meal 2: Chicken breast sandwich on whole wheat roll, lettuce, tomato, mayo, mustard

Meal 3: Turkey sandwich on whole wheat bread, fresh spinich, mayo and mustard, 1 apple

Meal 4:(went out) garden salad with 1/2 chicken breast, tomato, onions, feta cheese, italian dressing

water and vitamins (minus Nature greens which I'm out of and will post review of tomorrow)

****************************

No trainer today

Treadmill 45 minutes

Crunches (100) 5 sets of 20 reps holding a 35 pound plate to my chest

August 1, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-02T00:07:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: skipped

Meal 2: turkey sandwich on whole wheat bread w/ lettuce, pickles, mayo, mustard
Bowl of cubed watermelon

Meal 3: Chicken, rice and salsa burrito

Meal 4: skipped

Water and vitamins

*************************
workout: today the work out was light. I developed a bit of a painful hip after the last workout but rather than not go in I decided to tough it out. Turns out that it does feel a bit better now and may not have if I had stayed home.

series 1: lean forward at the waist and raise leg in back extending ball at arms length: 3 sets 15 reps for 2 sets/ 20 reps for last set
side leg lifts: 3 sets 12 reps first 2 sets 15 reps last set
standing reclined pullup holing bar for support and to pull up.
the bar was a little lower than chest high

series 2: inclined bench crunches with arms extended holding resistance band also held by my trainer: 3 sets 15 reps each

treadmill: 15 minutes

Thank you Jacob!

2006-08-01T00:59:00.000-07:00

Ever since Junior High school when lovely substitute teacher with bright green eyes played Graceland in class during a free work session I've been in love with the music of Paul Simon. Like I said in yesterday's post I think I must have worn that tape out 3 times before I bought the CD. It was with Graceland that I think I first developed my love of the acoustic sound and great lyrics and it's amazing to see, 64 year old, Simon 'still rockin' after all these years'.

The show appeared sold out and was just kicking off as the sun set over the mountains surrounding Lake Tahoe making the sky look like (as my friend jacob noted) an upside down lava flow. The setting was breath taking and the weather was perfect for an outdoor concet. I'll go as far as to say that sitting there 11th row center was amazing enough to make the puny plastic folding chair i was trying not to break little more than a petty pain in my butt. ;0)

Simon's band was terrific that night as they played for what seemed like 2 hours complete with 3 encores! Playing almost everything you could imagine from "Bridge Over Troubled Water" to several songs from Graceland which were beautifully performed thanks in large part to the wonderful harmonies his band was able to pull off. And, for fans of his newer work he didn't dissapoint playing a beautiful version of Father and Daughter which I noticed had a few men in the audience misting up a bit.

I'm gonna watch you shine
Gonna watch you grow
Gonna paint a sign
So you'll always know
As long as one and one is two wooo
There could never be a father who loved
His daughter more than I love you

I really don't know what else to say. It was a great evening with 2 old friends and some stellar music in a beautiful setting. Thanks Jacob, for thinking of me! And, Summer it was great to see you again. Let's not wait so long to do it again...oh and your baby is beautiful.

*********************************

Oh, oh, what a night, oh what a garden of delight, even now that sweet memory lingers.
I was playing my guitar, lying underneath the stars
just thanking the Lord for my fingers.

July 30 & 31, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-08-01T00:26:00.000-07:00

July 30

Meal 1: 1 Apple and 2 slices of bread w/ peanut butter

Meal 2: skipped

Meal 3: Chicken breast Sandwich and Sobe lean

Meal 4: Chicken/beef fajita combo in Tahoe after the show / lettuce, tomatoe, grilled onion and peppers, 3 tortillias, half breast of chicken and aprox the same beef, little sour cream/ 4 onion rings and 2 glasses of diet pepsi

Water and vitamnis

work out:
treadmill: 20 minutes
crunches: 3 sets 20 reps

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July 31

Meal 1: Skipped

Meal 2: Turkey sandwich / 2 slices of whole wheat bread, spinach, mustard and mayo/ 1 Apple

Meal 3: skipped

Meal 4: (before I tell you, promise not to get mad) ;) Cheese burger w/ pastrami, lettuce, tomato, onion, some kind of sauce... 1 apple

Water and Vitamins

Workout:

Treadmill: 30 Min

Crunches: 4 sets 20 reps (holding a 35lb weight plate to my chest)

Ok so two days of not so great eating. especially Meal 4:. I hope to get back on track tomorrow.

"Me and Julio down by the school yard..."

2006-07-30T13:37:00.000-07:00

My phone rang this morning and as i was half asleep and as the number was private I ignored it and went back to bed. I woke up an hour or so later and checked my voice mail only to be greeted by a voice from my not so distant past, offering me a ticket to see Paul Simon in Tahoe tonight with himself and another friend that I haven't seen in over a year! i said yes... and then proceeded to do a happy dance.

For those of you who've been reading for a while you know I like my folk/ acoustic music. Let me just tell you that this is a dream come true for me. I loves me some Paul Simon. I think I wore out Graceland like 3 times in tape format before buying the CD. It's just one of those albums that needs to be listened to 87,000 times.

(Oh, by the way if you still haven't checked out my friend Justin farren's web site at Justin Farren.com please go because, like graceland, this is the only other Cd I've ever worn out. It's simply one of the best listening experiences you're likely to have...so please go check out his site and look him up on iTunes for samples of all his songs from his CD "Sound of Flight")

Anyway. I'm stoked and I'll let you know all about it tomorrow! have a good sunday everyone or whatever day it is in your lovely part of the world! I'm off to Lake Tahoe!

Sean-crest out!

July 29, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-07-30T02:40:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: oatmeal and 1 large apple

Meal 2: chicken breast w/ marinara sauce and 2 slices of whole wheat bread

Meal 3: 1 half of a large togo's turkey sandwich, wheat roll, mayo, mustard, lettuce, pickles

Meal 4: 2nd half of earlier sandwich w/ bottle of sobe lean

Water and Vitamins

********************************************

Workout:

series 1:
Standing/raised arm crunches w/ light resistance: 3 sets 20 reps

Kneel downs holding bar for support: 3 sets 10 reps each leg (only 5 reps on the first set for the left leg. I was affraid of the strain but found my technique by the second and third set)

Standing chest flys w/ medium resistance: 3 sets 10 reps each arm

series 2:

Standing turning pull (i have no Idea what to call it): 2 sets 12 reps each arm

"I used to walk in the shade..."

2006-07-29T04:35:00.000-07:00

Little Note****

If you'll direct your attention to my picture at the top of the page you'll note that if you click on the image it will take you to my theme song which is now in mp3 format for anyone who would like a clean copy of it. =0)

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A few people have mentioned my positive outlook in the face of a seemingly daunting task. I guess it may seem odd. I mean...losing 20 or 30 lbs is often a task that people find overwhelming or at the least difficult. 250lbs is definitely a scary proposition and I don't want people to think that I don't have a clue what I've gotten myself into. Quite the contrary. I know how long it took for me to get where I am and I live with this excess weight every day. I've been depressed over it and I have let the sheer enormity of it all paralize me into complete inaction. So for all of those who think that I should be humble in the face of this enormous challange...just remember. I have been and that's why I am where I am today.

My entire outlook now hangs on the fact that I know how hard this is going to be. That's no shock. I know that in order to reach my goals I'm going to have to work harder than I have ever worked for any one thing. I know that I'm going to stumble and get back up and stumble again before this is all over but I also realize that no minor set back will end the process. It will only end when it's done. There are no expectations other than that I eventually achieve my goals. No arbitrary time lines no tricks or traps and no forks in the road. There's just a straight path from here to there and though I can't yet see the finish line I'm on the road and I'm headed in the right direction. The only thing left to do is walk until I get there. It's this simplicity that makes it possible for me to take on my task with a certain amount of ease and optimism.

In the past I've always built road blocks. I set too many goals like, "I want to lose this much by this date!" Or, "oooh if I just lose 20lbs a month I can get there by this date." It may sound too simple but if the only goal we have is the end goal and we just focus on that instead of chopping the journey up into little sections our task becomes much clearer.

Let me try to make a simple analogy...when I first began with my trainer he would give me an exercise to do and a certain amount of reps, for arguments sake let's say: Squats. He'd have me do 10 squats and the next set I'd be on the 8th squat and he'd see that I was getting through them eaiser this time so he'd say ok I want you to go to 15. Well that may be all fine an dandy in practice but I had paced myself to go all out to 10 and now I was expected to use the energy that I had stored up for the final 2 to give him 7 more? We have an agreement now that he tells me before the set how much he wants. I may not want to do that many but, at least, I can plan ahead and pace it out. And, as it turns out he knows exactly what I can and can't do so I trust him to make that decision and we get through it.

I guess my point is that it's all about pace. If we set up all of these little check points or road blocks along the way to our main goal we may find that we only save enough enthusiasm and energy to get to that next check point and then what do we have left for the rest of the race?

July 28, 2006 meals and Workout

2006-07-29T02:37:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: out of protein powder (note to self: pick some up) Toast w/ peanutbutter and 1 apple

Meal 2: turkey sandwich (home) 2 slices of wheat bread fresh spinach, mustard mayo, apple

Meal 3: Chicken breast, small green salad, whole wheat noodles w/ marinara sauce

Meal 4: no meal went to movies and had small popcorn w/ a little drizzle of butter flavored food stuffs and sobe lean (ok not good but...good! if you know what I mean) ;)

Water and Vitamins (almost out: Note to self post review and contact ryan at naturegreens)

*****************************

Workout:

Treadmill: 30 min

Crunches: 3 sets 20 reps

I went to the Dr and the Dr said...

2006-07-28T00:30:00.000-07:00

OK so I went to the Dr today. I told him about my foot and he agreed that it was most likely Plantars Facitiis and recommended that I get a foot support from the pharmacy and see how that works. I guess I'll try that if it comes back. As for the Insomnia he referred me to an Insomnia class...I hope they aren't teaching how to get insomnia because if they are they'll be preaching to the choir. I did get my hemoglobin A1C test results back...for those of you not familliar with it. The hemoglobin A1C is a blood test that is meant to give you a 3 month average of your blood sugar levels.

A reading anywhere between 4.0 and 6.0 would be considered normal (non-diabetic) range. Diabetics are thought to be doing well on their treatment plan if their reading falls below 7 and some feel 6.5.

in feb of 2006 my Hemoglobin A1C was tested at 7.1 and I spent much of the beginning of the year feeling really ill. I missed a lot of work. And while that may not be that high and some people function rather well at much higher levels the combination of my blood sugar, my weight, sleep apnea and some minor anemia I was experiencing was enough to put me out of commission. It was the at this point that I finally decided to take charge of my health.

Well as of today, after 7 weeks of diet and exercise, my Hem A1C is sitting at 6.5 which means (to me at least) that there is a fair chance of reversing my diabetes... huzzah!

Oh and my work out clothes feel like a tent on me. I'm gonna weigh in next week and may take some pictures so you can tell me if you notice a difference... cool?

July 27, 2006 meals and Workout

2006-07-27T23:59:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein shake

Meal 2: Chicken breast sandwich on whole wheat roll, lettuce and tomato, mustard and mayo

Meal 3: (you'll be so proud) Lagre salad w/ tomatoes etc. and sliced turkey/ italian dressing

meal 4: 2 chicken breast soft tacos/ lettuce and tomatoe and 1 large apple

Water and Vitamins

***************

Workout

standing over the shoulder pull down aprox 55lbs each arm(alternating arms): 3 sets 10 reps each arm
Standing across body medicine ball toss: 10lbs ball: 3 sets 15 reps to each side

standing press alternating arms (low weight): 3 sets 12 reps
Squat while holding a bar, holding at bottom of squat for 3 seconds: 3 sets 10 reps

no cardio today/ had to take brother to airport/ will go on off day tomorrow for cardio

My day in a nut shell..

2006-07-27T10:02:00.000-07:00

Going to the Dr to talk about whay my foot has been hurting lately and about why I can't seem to sleep at night. I've missed a lot of work this year due to my health issues and even though I feel healthier because of the whole gym and diet thing I still have other issues especially related to fatigue that make getting things done difficult.

I did get some of my blood tests back from yesterday's tests and everything looks good. I always like to brag about this because it seems so contrary to my weight but my Cholesterol result is really good. While it's recommended that people's cholesterol be under 200 to be healthy my Cholesterol sits firmly at 138 for the second testing cycle. Thank you. Ok it's all genetic but still I brag! ha-ha *doin' a dance*
I'm still waiting on my Hemoglobin A1C to determine what my 3 month average blood sugar has been. I'll keep you posted because this is the one that lets us know if the Diabetes is getting better or worse. I have a feeling that it will have gotten better.

On a less self aggrandizing note I'd like to extend my respect and best wishes to my older brother P and my younger brother's girlfriend S. They are both in the middle of taking the State Bar Exam in their respective states (NY and CA). I wish you the best of luck and the least of frustration and I send my love and admiration for all your hard work!

Blogger acting up...

2006-07-27T03:50:00.000-07:00

I'll try posting again a little later today. Blogger is acting twitchy...

July 26, 2006 meals and Workout

2006-07-27T01:46:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Slept in

Meal 2: no meal had to fast 12 hours so That I could go to the Lab for routine blood tests

Meal 3: Protein Shake, 1 apple, peanutbutter sandwich

Meal 4: Large Togo's Turkey Sandwich (normal config) (bottle of sobe)

Water and Vitamins

***********************************

Workout:

Treadmill 30 min
incline crunches: 3 sets 20 reps

I'm full of it...

2006-07-26T01:39:00.000-07:00

Quick edit***

I want to take a quick moment to send a huge thank you to the 3 latest contributers to my Diabetes fundraiser. I can't believe how many wonderful people are really stepping up and laying it down for the cause. I personally thank each and every one of you for your generous gifts!

Brooke O'dell
Robin L.
Charil Lorenzo

New Total $521.11
Thanks eveyone!

**********

"it" being Ideas or big dreams and schemes!

As I mentioned in a previous post I "run" a non-profit music education program here in my home town (I use the quotation marks because the program was kind of on auto pilot last year but I'm hoping to have more time and energy to dedicate to it this coming school year). So far the money we need has been raised through Show's that we put on in local venues with local bands and through grants that my partner Clay writes. We have dreams of making the program a big deal and expanding our student base or at least being able to reach a lot more children than we already do. All of which takes money.

I've been thinking lately about doing something fun on the internet like this blog that could raise money for not only our Music Ed Program but could raise Awareness about the lack of Music ED in public schools and maybe raise funds for us and other programs like ours out there doing good work.

I don't want to give away the whole project because I the last thing I need is for someone to snag it and do it before I even get it off the ground. I'll give you the jist though and maybe you can let me know what you think.

Ok, So I have a 1975 mustang II that is in need of a new engine and tranny as well as a good paint job and interior. Actually the paint and the interior are ok but I'm looking to really pimp this thing out like on that MTV show. My plan is to find a custom shop who will quote me a price to completely rebuild the car...maybe even donate some of the work but quote us a price and write us a letter of promise to do the job at that price. (under our parent non-profit our program has 501c3 status in the US so any work or parts they donate would be tax deductible) Then I have a product in mind to sell for $1 each (an extra 50 cents if shipping is needed) and we could sell as many of those as it took to raise the funds to rebuild the car. Once the car was complete I would use it for 1 year for publicity purposes for the non-profit and then I would Auction off the car and all the proceeds would go to music education...our project and maybe one or 2 nationally known programs like "Little Kids Rock"...

I'm expecting the bill to be around $20,000 maybe less (anyone out there familliar with rebuilding clasic cars let me know how far off I am. the body is very sound and only has minor dents) and I think it could be done. I may even be able to get the "product" I want to sell donated as well otherwise I'll have to tack on another $3,000 to cover that...

I've wanted to use the mustang for something charity related since I'm begining to think I may never rebuild it for my own use. Also I would really like to push the premise that you can make a $1 dollar donation and make a huge difference.

I'm not sure when I would start but I'd like to get it going this year if possible. It's a matter of getting the right shop to deliver the right quote and getting the product lined up to sell.

So, what do you think would you pay a dollar to give a child the gift of music?

July 25, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-07-26T01:19:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake

Meal 2: Chicken Breast Sandwich and garden salad

Meal 3: Half of a Large Togo's Turkey Sandwich on Whole Wheat Roll, mayo and mustard, lettuce and pickles and 1 apple (bottle of sobe lean)

Meal 4: second half of sandwich from meal 3

Water and Vitamins

****************************************************************

Steps on 9"? Step /turning to step up and then turning back to step down: 3 sets 10 reps each leg
Seated rows unknown weight: 3 sets 15 reps
Seated squats with 2 X 25lbs dumbells (curled upon standing): 3 sets 15 reps

Chest Flys with heavy resistance band: 2 sets 20 reps

no treadmill. Waited 15 min but none opened up and I was getting stiff/ will get in half hour on wednesday

Watch My Loss Goes Public...

2006-07-24T23:53:00.000-07:00

...WAAAAAIIIT!

Before everyone runs off to your stock broker with your piggy banks, flower jars, sock drawers and those soup cans with the false bottoms hoping to buy up 51% controlling stock in my blog so that you can show up to the board meeting in a mink coat smoking one of those really thin cigarettes on an extra long filter hoping to fire me an take over the blog so that you can balloon up to over 500lbs and then try to lose it all so that you can get on Oprah and jump on her sofa like some sort of Tom Cruise Wanna-be..... stop.

All I mean is that Today was the day that they let me set up a table at my gym so that I could bring my message to the glistening masses. And that's just what I did. There I sit...laptop and print-outs in hand smiling like a dieter who has just been told that the FDA has reclasified pizza as a fruit.

There they were..my public! Just waiting to line up and listen to my touching story....or maybe they were lining up for the drinking fountain. But, i wouldn't let that deter me. I'm at least half as clever as a drinking fountain and I would soon have their attention.

Turns out that that drinking fountain was the freaking Einstein of drinking fountains. I was clearly out witted...I don't think anyone even saw me. ;)

But seriously. It was slow at first until I realized that I was just going to have to speak up....'here goes'...."Padone me ma'am?" I spoke timidly at first. "How do you feel about finding a cure for Diabetes?"...she stopped and came over...! Sweet my first person...I was in business! I repeted, "How do you feel about finding a cure for Diabetes?" Her Hand flew up to her chest and I thought that I had really touched on something with that question...She then replied "Oh thank God! I thought you said something else...nooo no I don't have Diabetes. I'm not interested!" and walked away quickly.

Uuuuuuunhhh?

Lets look at that play in super slow "analogus" motion..."do you want to donate to the World Trade Center victim's families?" "Wahh? Oh...Thank GOD! I thought you said something else....!No thanks. I didn't live in N.Y during the attack! Tra la la!"

Well...Ok it wasn't as bad as all that but it was a strange response. As if the only people my information should go to were people with Diabetes. *sigh* lol

After that it got much better. I eventually spoke to about 20 or so really thoughtfull people. I collected emails and received a $10 donation! All in all i had a productive day and met some very nice people (Who I hope read to the bottom of this page so that their first impression of me, on line, is not that of a whiner)

Thanks to everyone who stopped by my table at 24HR Fintess on 7/24/06! I hope you enjoy the blog and any donation the the American Diabetes Association would be greatly appreciated!

July 24, 2006 Meals and Workout

2006-07-24T23:05:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: sleep

Meal 2: turkey Sandwich on whole wheat bread w/ mustard, mayo, fresh spinach and 1 large apple

Meal 4: Chicken breast sandwich on whole wheat bun w/ lettuce tomato and mayo

Meal 4: Chicken burrito w/ rice and beans (bottle of sobe lean)

Water and vitamins

**************************************

Workout:

Treadmill: 30 min varying speeds from 2 to 2.5 mph

Oh Dear God The Heat...

2006-07-24T01:04:00.000-07:00

This is getting to be too much... *sigh* I swear it was over 110 degrees again today and right now as I lie here and type this it is currently 84 degrees at 1:30am. Augh...when will it end? It looks like we have 3 more days of this before it cools down to a nice balmy 100 degrees...*sigh* I feel like I'm going to wilt.
Thank God for AC but still...

On a lighter note my trainer has arranged for me to set up a table at the gym Monday afternoon and put out info about my website and fundraiser so we may be getting some company soon. I guess I'll print out some info and my web address...I'll probably take my computer along as well so that people can get a look at the site right there at the table. We'll see. It could be fun...maybe I'll raise some funds as well. Wish me luck.

July 23, 2006 Meals

2006-07-24T01:00:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Slept in again (finally sleeping)

Meal 2: Protein Shake, Peanut butter on whole wheat bread and 1 apple

Meal 3: Chicken Breast Sandwich on Wheat bread w. small garden salad and Itallian dressing

Meal 4: Regular Togo's Turkey Sandwich on Whole Wheat roll w/ mustard and mayo, lettuce and pickles (sobe lean)

Water and Vitamins

Mommy...I'm scared of the spandex monster...

2006-07-23T00:35:00.000-07:00

I just realized today that not only am I getting great physical benefits from the gym but it's turned out to be an environment that I truly enjoy.

Going in, my expectation was that it would be a place full of judgment and discomfort. Seriously. You've seen the commercials for fitness gyms. Bunch of skinny or muscle bound people running around in spandex or less, slappin' each other's butts with towels...with their biceps and their triceps and their quads and their gluteus minimis all flexin' about almost mocking you through the screen. All the while sipping on some high protein, low carb, super blugreen algae shake delivered to them in the sauna or at their shiny workout station between reps of 7,000lb leg presses or their third circuit of Hungarian dead lifts while they're spotted by their own personal trainer cloned from the combined DNA of Mr Atlas and Sheena queen of the jungle! Meanwhile, I'm sitting there, gluteus maximus firmly rooted to my slowly shrinking sofa, couch or davenport for those of you up north, munching on a day old pizza wondering why I can't look like that! Anyone else...I know I'm not alone in this...

What I've found is quite the opposite. It really is terrible how much many of us make of our own perceived sort comings, so much so, in fact, that we expect everyone else to pick up on it and react a certain way. It can be very unsettling or at the least confusing when our expectations are not met and we are, instead, treated with...*GaSp* respect... "Wha? huh? Respect? But I'm not worthy of respect am I?!" "Just look at how I feel about myself...I don't respect me why should others?"

Since I've been at the gym What I've found is that, first of all, people are generally much too into what they're doing to take time to be judgmental of others. Then there are the folks who take out one ipod ear plug long enough to ask you politely, if you are almost done with (insert equipment name here). And the ones who do really acknowledge you are the type of people who are typically genuine in nature and will often toss a sincere smile your way or ask you how your workout is going or if they have spoken with you before they may feel comfortable enough to jokingly scold you about not wanting to "catch you slacking on your workout". Women, who I know would not give me the time of day on the street engage me in genuine conversation as if there were none of the stereotypical physio-social boundaries that exist in the "real" world. Just being there and putting in effort brings with it a certain respect and even camaraderie that one might not expect until experienced.

I'm not sure why I wanted to bring this up except that I know that people can be afraid of taking that first step and getting into some sort of public/social exercise arena. I say do it! It'll do worlds of good for your self esteem and worlds of good for your health!

July 22, 2006 Meals and workout

2006-07-23T00:19:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake and 1 apple

Meal 2: peanutbutter on 2 slices of wheat bread (rushing off to the gym)

Meal 3: Subway chicken sandwich on whole wheat roll, lettuce, pickles mayo and mustard (bottle sobe lean)

Meal 4: Chicken, rice and bean burrito (large)

Water and Vitamins

Workout:

series 1:
Squat and toss with 10lbs Ball (granny style): 3 sets 15 reps
Standing inclined pushups with alternating knee lift: 3 sets 20 reps

Series 2: (resistance machine)
standing twist (at the waist) minimal weight: 3 sets 20 reps
standing resistance press w/ unknown weight: 3 sets 15 reps

Treadmill: 15 min

July 21, 2006 Meals and workout

2006-07-22T02:34:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Skipped/ over slept again

Meal 2: Peanut butter Sandwich on 2 slices of whole wheat bread and 2 small apples

Meal 3: chicken breast sandwich w/ mayo and mustard and lettuce on whole wheat bun and about 15 mini carrots

Meal 4: Large Togo's turkey sandwich on whole wheat roll with extra lettuce and reg. Pickles/ mayo and mustard (bottle of sobe lean)

water and vitamins

************************************************************

Workout:

Treadmill: 30 min changing between 2 mph and 2.5 mph every 5 minutes
Incline crunches: 3 sets 20 reps

Are You My Wife?

2006-07-21T03:18:00.000-07:00

Gather 'round! This one's for the single ladies!

Have you ever thought to yourselves, "There are just no good men out there..." Well you, my friends of the fairer sex, are in for a treat today! Now before you get your hopes up I'm not anouncing my eligibility or anything like that so don't all jump up at once...heh heh...ooook no one's moving. How many of you did I just scare off? lol

Noooo my friends what I have for you is of much greater appeal. I would like to direct your attention to this here link Are You My Wife.com!

My name is Allan Wills and I will go anywhere in the world for the right date.

This is where all your wildest dreams could come true...or you could just meet a really nice guy who has decided to shun tradition and throw his fate to the cyber winds.

Meet Allan Wills. Writer, actor, photographer, lover of life and one heck of a handsome guy! Ask him on a date or ask him to complete a task. He's game for the game and he's playing to win.

So, if you are up for adventure and you think that convention is just some place you might find shriners in funny hats. This is the place for you. Allan asks "Are you my wife?"...well...are you?

July 20, 2006 Meals and workout

2006-07-21T00:45:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake

Meal 2: Turkey Sandwich on whole wheat bread w/ fresh spinach/ mayo and mustard and 1 apple

Meal 3: Chicken breast sandwich on whole wheat bun, mayo, mustard, lettuce and garden salad

Meal 4: Peanutbutter sandwich on whole wheat bread and 1 apple

water and vitamns

********************************************************

Work out:
series 1:
Boxing while holding resistance rope following trainer from side to side: 3 sets 1 minute

Free squats, squating enough to touch an upright dumbell set between my legs: 3 sets 20 rebs

series 2:

standing one arm rows/ pulling from elevated incline: 120lbs 3 sets 10 reps each arm

Inclined crunches side to side and lifting each knee while holding out 10lbs weight: 3 sets 10 reps each

treadmill: 15 min

Raw Scale Data...

2006-07-19T20:06:00.000-07:00

I was near the hospital today and decided to weigh myself even though I'm not sure if I can trust the scale. I've decided that as long as I'm using the same scale and that same scale doesn't seem to fluctuate with regard to readings taken against it's own previous readings then I can at least trust it to give me accurate progress even if my actual weight is not 100% accurate. Meaning if the scale says I weigh 100 lbs (for argument's sake) and say I lose 2 lbs...as long as the scale then tells me that I weigh 98 lbs I can trust it to give me my accurate loss...even though I may weigh 530 down to 528. It's still an accurate assessment of progress... Does that make sense?

Given that here are my figures from my first weigh in on June 8 through Today July 19 (41 days)

6/08/06
Total Weight: 527.6lbs (239.8kg)
Body Fat: 51.5% or 271.7lbs (123.5 Kg)
Fat Free Mass: 48.5% or 255.9lbs (116.3kg)

7/04/06
Total Weight: 533.8lbs (242.6kg)
Body Fat: 50.4% or 266.7lbs (121.2 Kg)
Fat Free Mass: 49.6% or 262.5lbs (119.3kg)

7/19/06
Total Weight: 532.4lbs (242.0kg)
Body Fat: 46.8% or 249.2lbs (113.3 Kg)
Fat Free Mass: 53.2% or 283.2lbs (128.7kg)

Now again I show an over all weight gain of 4.8lbs
but if you look at the Body fat...
on 6/08 My body fat was at 271.7 lbs
on 7/04 My body fat was at 266.7 lbs loss of 5lbs of fat
on 7/19 My body fat now at 249.2 lbs Total loss of 22.5 lbs of fat

You can go ahead and do the math...the Fat Free Body Mass numbers even out as well and show a gain of 27.3 lbs

27.3 lbs Muscle Gain
22.5 lbs Fat Loss
=4.8 lbs weight gain

So there you are! I think that's real progress. It appears that moving this large body around just happens to build muscle at a very efficient rate.

Like I said, until I find a scale that I know is calibrated and as long as this scale seems consistant against it's own readings I'll continue to post my progress from it. Now as soon as the muscle gain plateaus it'll really start eating the fat and then I'll see the number's start to drop!

So what do you think. It's never easy with me folks...seems like my body wants to do this the hard way...

No one said it was gonna be easy...

July 19, 2006 Meals

2006-07-19T19:40:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein shake

Meal 2: Peanutbutter sandwich on whole wheat bread and 1 apple

Meal 3: Large Togo's Turkey sandwich on whole wheat roll w/ lettuce, pickles, mustard and mayo (bottle of sobe lean)

Meal 4: Turkey sandwich on 2 slices of whole wheat bread w/ fresh spinich, mayo and mustard and 1 apple

A little Perspective...

2006-07-19T01:52:00.000-07:00

I have another donation to mention! A huge, Watch My Loss, thank you to

Alain Lapalme

For a generous donation to diabetes research! You gift brings us up to $481.11 (2 donations pending entry)! Thanks Alain!

************************************

Ok! I thought tonight that I'd give everyone a little perspective on just what 250lbs looks like. Trust me I didn't really understand what I was up against until I started searching the internet for "Things that weigh 250LBS!"

the first item on our list tonight is a really good way to illustrate 250 lbs of fat... I give you...

250 Lbs of Silly Putty
Can you say eewww? I know I can. Good gravey that's a lot of silly putty. Imagine carrying that around with you every day...

Ok...next we turn to the animal kingdom for a cute and fuzzy if not dangerous in a "don't corner me or my cubs or I'll scratch your eyes out and eat your splean while wearing your entrails for a hat" sort of fashion. Seeee 250Lbs can kill you in more than one way... I give you...

250LB Mountain Lion (cougar)

The subject of our next image not only weighs 250lbs but is named after a tasty treat that if eaten on a regular basis could cause someone to gain 250 extra lbs...I give you

250lbs of rockin' Meatloaf

And last but not least a child hood idol of mine. I guess it goes to prove that when we mature we must sometimes lose childish things...I give to you...

Mark "Mr. 70 home run in 1 season" Mcgwire
Big Mac
Agent Orange
One half of the Bash Brothers

That's right folks I'm acctually carrying around the equivalent of Mark Mc-freaking-gwire on me in addition to my own lean body mass...Yikes...

I guess I have my work cut out for me... ;)

July 18, 2006 Meals and workout

2006-07-18T23:35:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake

Meal 2: skipped

Meal 3: Turkey Sandwich on sourdough bread, lettuce, pickles, mustard and mayo and bowl of cubed watermellon

Meal 4: Large fresh Chicken, rice and pinto bean burrito, hand full of tortilla chips and salsa

Water and vitamin

**********************************************************************

Workout:
series 1:

Standing create a figure 8 with arms while holding one end of a resistanace band and the instructor holds the other and turns in the opposite direction! I call it "GIVE ME MY ROPE BACK...DON'T MAKE ME RUN AFTER YOU...TRUST ME!" 3 sets 20 reps

One handed side toss with 6 lbs medicine ball: 3 sets 15 reps

Standing bench press on resistance machine 3 sets 15 reps

series 2:

Squats holding onto a bar for support: 2 sets 15 reps

bent over barbell row: 2 sets 15 reps

15 min on treadmill

Proud, relieved, intrigued...

2006-07-18T00:08:00.000-07:00

It's 12:10am where I live and a moment ago my page counter click over to 7,000 hits since made my very first post...in 53 days...7,000 unique clicks! You guys are the best! Your continued support and encouragement through my first crazy month and the days that preceded...nothing but great replies and emails from really wonderful people. Of course I can't forget Kyle from One Red Paperclip.com for shining the light and showing everyone the way here. Thanks Man and Nice House my friend! I can't wait to see what you have planned next! I still have a long row to hoe butit's only bigger and better and smaller and thinner things from here on out!!

Next...If you had a chance to check out my Food and Workout post for tonight you'll be happt to note that I was able to get in and get 1/2 treadmill time and 100 crunches...more importantly...very little heel pain! Wahoo...I think that a lot of you folks were right...I may have "Plantars fasciitis". I did some of the indicated exsecises and took some Ibuprofin this morning and Wha-lah loads less pain! Oh yeah....After I pushed myself like that I feel like something missing had just popped into place. I dunno..I feel like this thing is about to kick in big time. It's hard to explain but I feel really good right now and am looking forward to tomorrow's work out. We may just be on our way. Stay tuned!

Lastly...

I received an email today from a young writer who is working on a novel and he asked me if he could interview me about my experience being severely over weight. It seems that one of his characters is roughly my size and since he has no personal experience being my size and since he read my blog and feels that I'm able to be candid about my experiences he thinks that I may be able to give him some good character development info.

I love the idea and I plan to write him back and accept his request.... (by the way if you are the guy that sent me the email and you read this...consider it my response and start getting your questions ready because i'll be in touch sometime within the next 48 hours. I'd email you right now but I need sleep!)

So there she dear watchers...another day and a positive outlook....all in all a good thing..no? :0)

July 17, 2006 Meals and workout

2006-07-17T23:44:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake

Meal 2:Apple

Meal 3: Turkey Sandwich w/ lettuce, mustard and mayo on Whole Wheat, bowl of cubed watermellon

Meal 4: Chicken breast Sandwich on whole Wheat Bun, lettuce mustard, mayo

I know I knwo but it was sooo flippin hot out today that I couldn't eat a thing

**********************

Workout:

Treadmill 30 minutes

Crunches on a incline : 5 sets of20

I'm your puppet....

2006-07-17T00:34:00.000-07:00

So, I've been thinking about what I'm going to do for my pod cast... I haven't forgotten. I've just been busy trying to figure out what I want to do to make it interesting. I think I've decided to make a puppet of myself like the one that I showed you in that earlier post. I've been really interested in getting back into puppet making. I figure I can use it from time to time in the video podcast and if I make 2 I could even auction one off on eBay with half of the proceeds going to Diabetes Research. Would anyone be interested on bidding on something like that? I wonder... ;)

I think I'm going to start gathering materials this week and I'll show my progress as I go. It may be ambitious but it could be really fun. Heck I may even be able to extend the idea if I get good enough, with enough practice. Maybe one day I'll be able to offer to build custom puppets for people maybe even hold workshops and teach people how to make them. Ok, I know I'm way ahead of myself. I've built one puppet in my life...I'll get to work on the Me-puppet and see if it actually looks anything like me first.

July 16, 2006 Meals

2006-07-17T00:16:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Slept in

Meal 2: Chicken breast sandwich on whole wheat bun w/ mayo and lettuce and 1 large Apple

Meal 3: 1/2 large Togo's turkey sandwich on whole wheat roll, lettuce and pickles, mayo and mustard
(took sandwich to the movies and had a small popcorn w/ NO butter and bottle of sobe lean)

Meal 4: the other half of my turkey sandwich...

Water and Vitamins

******************************************

Still resting heel... *sigh*

Clear a path! I'm bigger than you are.

2006-07-16T01:32:00.000-07:00

Again! Let me first thank the latest watcher for his wonderful and thoughtful donation to the Diabetes drive!

Steve Kleinsmith

Our hats are off sir! The best to you and yours!

Also due to My Kleinsmith's request I will soon be posting my Paypal and mailing info for those of you who would prefer to use those methods instead of using a credit card through the ADA Donations page I have set up. Please remember, If there is a method of donation that you would rather us please let me know and I'll make whatever arrangements are needed and IF YOU ARE A BUSINESS OR PERSON WITH A VERY GIVING HEART AND YOU WOULD LIKE TO MATCH ANYONE'S DONATION OR A DAY'S, WEEK'S OR MONTH'S WORTH OF DONATIONS please contact me and we'll get you the recognition you deserve. I'm also willing to posts company or personal banners for the durration of the matching period as well...let's talk!

********************************

I was hanging around at my friends Justin and Kerry's house today and we were all talking as they hung drywall in their soon to be kitchen. The topic of body size came up at one point and Kerry asked me something about whether I find that my size intimidates people or not and it caused me to think a little. I mean, it's not that I hadn't given it thought before but I don't think that I've ever thought about in the context that one day (in the close future) I won't be as big as i am today.

To answer the question...Yes. I do find that my size intimidates some people. Although I'm not always sure if it's just my size or if it's a combination of size and race at times. By the way, because I know that it's hard to tell by looking at me and for those of you wondering my ethnic back ground is rather simple. As I'm told my biological mother was Caucasian and my Bilogoical father was Black. I was, however, raised in a completely Caucasian family. I only mention this because my size has often given people to believe that I am of Samoan or some other Islander heritage.

Back to size... I guess I've always been conscious of people's reaction to me. And, I have generally gone out of my way to make people feel more comfortable around me or at least done what I can to aleviate their concerns if I suspect they may have any. Example: walking down a street and an elderly person is approaching. If I sense discomfort or even if I don't I'll make sure to make direct eye contact and smile and knod which will generally suffice. If I feel it's not enough I'm not above crossing a street in an effort to mitigate their fear. I've done the same on dark streets for women and children as well.

Now, being intimidating is not always a bad thing. Not that I frequent bars much as i'm more of a coffee house type person. I have had the occasion to happen upon a physical confrontation or two and through sheer spectacle of size have been able to negotiate a peacefull outcome. I've also given people pause when the may have normally acted out physically against myself. Case in point: I went to a bar one night to see one of my favorite performers "Jonathan Richman" perform. I was waiting for the show to start and the bar was really crowded. I found a great spot to stand where I had a good view of the stage but someone decided to force his way through the crowd and stop directly in my line of view. On top of that he was wearing one of those brimmed fishing hats that made him a couple of inches taller than he would be normally. Well, I figured no harm and tapped him on the shouder and asked him to scoot over a couple of feet. His reaction was to NOT look over his shoulder but rather to stand up taller blocking more of my view. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and again I politely tapped him on the shoulder and asked him to please scoot over a foot or so so that he wouldn't block my view. Again he ignored me so I did the only thing I could think to do...I grabbed him by the shoulders and I moved him over about a foot. It was then that he decided to turn around and you could tell he was about to...well... give me what fer but then he saw me and stopped abruptly and all he could get out was "Geeeze man all you had to do was ask!" To which I replied..."I did man. Twice!"...to which he came back..."Alright man Alright" and turned around and a little later moved to a different spot. In this situation I found that my size was definately a benefit. Oh by the way if any of you know John McRea, the lead singer from Cake...tell him hello from the big guy he stood in front of at the old Press Club in Sacramento a few years back. I like your music man...uh...don't be an ass!

Another thing that I've noticed but try not to react to is the sound of people locking their car doors as I cross the street in the cross walk in front of them. I know that a lot of men and especially men of color get this from time to time but I don't remember the last time I didn't hear the 'clunk' of a door lock or see someone reach quickly across their car to hit the passenger door lock as I crossed the street. Oh I also love the people who hit their remote car alarm and extra time if they see me getting out of my car near theirs. Like I said though I've tried to not let these things affect me too much. As for the car door locking, I get it. It's a matter of safety. You don't know me and you have no idea what my intentions are. Might I perhaps suggest that you lock your door upon starting your car. Then you're safe for the whole trip and you won't go giving the big but kind hearted guy in the crosswalk a complex... ;)

So, I guess I have mixed feelings about the benefits of being big. On the one hand I don't generally get challenged physically but on the other I feel , out of personal responsibility, that I can't walk down the street without making constant calculations regarding others and their comfort.

I honestly think that I may miss some of the benefits of my size when I lose the weight but I also have a feeling that just blending will be a nice change of pace...

July 15, 2006 Meals

2006-07-16T01:21:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake and 1 large Apple

Meal 2: Turkey Sandwich on whole wheat bread, mustard, mayo w/ fresh Spinich, bowl of chicken vegitable soup and 1 apple

Meal 3: sesame chicken over rice w/ steamed broccoli

Meal 4: peanut butter on 2 slices of whole wheat bread and 3 cellery stalks with salt

Water and vitamins

**********************************

Normal work out day but trainer is out of town and mu heel is killing me today. I'm starting to wonder if I have a heel spur. I'm going to the Dr next week if it doesn't stop hurting by wednesday.

I do plan to go tomorrow morning and try to get in my cardio and some crunches.

I really want to add some extra time and days to my treadmill but this foot is holding me back and i'm just not ready to make the move to swimming just yet...no matter what you say I just can't get past the block i have about taking my shirt off in front of people...not yet.

Fortunately I am able to do all of the conditioning and muscle strengthening exercises that My trainer gives me and so i do get some cardio benefit from that. As son as I can put it all together I have a feeling things will pick up.

Paris Hilton plans no sex for one year

2006-07-15T01:15:00.000-07:00

Friday July 14th, 2006 at 12:08 pm by LucyLastic

Paris Hilton announced last month that she wanted to stay single for a while but now it looks like she's going to take it a step further: she's planning to be steer clear of sex for a year in order to "rediscover" herself.

In a recent tv interview, she revealed: "I'm doing it just because I want to. I feel I'm becoming stronger as a person."

"Every time I have a boyfriend I'm just so romantic, and I'll put all my energy into the guy, and I don't really pay attention to myself."
************************

Damn! And right when I was fixin' to make my move!!

July 14, 2006 meals and Workout

2006-07-14T22:56:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake

Meal 2: Sliced turkey on a garden salad w/ Italian dressing from the lunch truck

Meal 3: Half of a Large Togo's Turkey Sandwich Wheat, Mustard, Mayo, lettuce, pickles, tomato

Meal 4: 2nd half of togo's sandwich and 1 large apple

Water and Vitamins

*****************************

Workout:

Ankle felt a little better so I went in for,
Treadmill 20 min
70 crunches on an incline bench (35 with 25 pound weight pressed to alternating knee on each crunch)

I think I saw the sand man...

2006-07-14T01:50:00.000-07:00

I have a feeling that if I act right now I may be able to catch that old sand man and get some much needed sleep...so I'm gonna do that.
G-night ya'll! Sweet dreams...w/ splenda for those of us with the diabetes!

July 13, 2006 meals and Workout

2006-07-14T01:14:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Soy Protein Shake

Meal 2: Chicken breast sandwich on Whole Wheat bun w/ lettuce and tomato, mustadr and mayo and 1 apple

Meal 3 and 4: Large togo's Turkey sandwich w/ letuce and pickle, mustard and mayo

Water and Vitamins

***********************************
Workout:
Rowing w/ weight "unknown" but heavy 3 sets 15 reps
Arms extended circles w/ 10lbs medicine ball

Tricept press w/ 40lbs dumbell: 3 sets 10 reps
Standing barbell press and alternate leg lift: 3 sets 20 reps
Sitting squats: 3 sets 20 reps

Treadmill: 10 minutes/ Heel still in pain but wanted to give it a try. feeling a little better...will try again tomorrow!

Who's Sammie??

2006-07-13T02:19:00.000-07:00

I would like to take this opportunity to give huge concratulations to a few friends of mine who were recognized tonight for their dedication to their craft and their passion for performing some pretty great music! For those of you not from my home town and even for some of you who are but don't travel in the same circles. This evening at the Historic Crest Theatre in Downtown Sacramento, The Sacramento News held it's 15 annual Sacramento Area Music Awards! Better known as the S.A.M.M.I.E.S.

This is a local muisc awards show that recognizes the best of the best in area Independant Music and musicians!

This year was especially important to me because, although I technicaly ' know' many local musicians, seven of my very closest friends were nominated for various awards and all but two of them won in the respective catagories!!!!

Of course you know my Friend Justin Farren . Justin was the writer and primary singer of my theme song Well, Justin was Nominated in the Folk/Acoustic catagory for the second year and WON his first SAMMIE for BEST Folk/Acoustic performer! Go Justin!

Please Click on THIS HERE LINK to read Justin's Sammie's Profile and to listento a couple of his wonderful songs!

Also to my buddies Brian Rogers, Andre Fylling and Sam Phelps who form the fabulous "Four Guys From Reno"! Con-frigggen-gratulations for your 3rd win in a row as Sacramento's BEST Jazz Band. This third win now cements them in as SAMMIE'S Hall OF Fame Members. Hall Of Fame Vets and all in their early 20's! I love you guys! Please visit THIS LINK RIGHT HERE! to learn more about this amazing band and to get a taste of what they do!

I want to also give mention to my good friend Dean Haakenson from the band "Be Brave Bold Robot" who was also up for the Folk/Acoustic award with Justin farren. Dean is the only person in that catagory that i would have been ok with if he had beaten Justin. Dean is a Lovely, bearded, Sweaty beautiful man who put on one of the fiersest performances on record tonight! He received the much deserved ONLY standing ovation of the evening and not to mention the most gracious gesture of covering one of Justin's Songs and then calling Justin up on stage to perform sing along on one of Dean's originals later in the set! A friendlier competition there has never been and it was an honor to witness! I love you too man! They don't come much better than you!

And lastly I want to give my congrats to My friends in Compadre for getting their first nomination in the R&B/Funk catagory...Uhhhh who are the Benny's anyway? I don't know either but You'll get them next year..just keep on doing what you do that get's them dancing the dance that they dance!

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I also want to make sure that I remember to thank
Tommi H.
My good friend Brian Rogers
and My Fitness Trainer Kendrick
for their recent contributions to my Diabetes Fundraiser!
I can't tell you how much i appreciate it! Thank You all!

Brian and Kendrick I'll be posting your donations later today!

July 12, 2006 meals and Workout

2006-07-13T02:07:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Protein Shake

Meal 2: Turkey Sandwich on Whole Wheat Bread w/ mayo, mustard, fresh spinich and 1 Apple

Meal 3: took a nap in the mid afternoon

Meal 4: Chicken and Broccoli over steamed rice

Water and Vitamins

July 11, 2006 meals and Workout

2006-07-12T03:48:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: slept in

Meal 2: Turkey Sandwich on Whole Wheat Bread w/ mayo, mustard, fresh spinich and 1 Apple

Meal 3 and 4: 1 Large Togo's sandwich Whole wheat roll, turkey, lettuce, Pickles, mustard, Mayo
1 half bowl whole wheat spagetti with home made marinara sauce

Water and Vitamins

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Workout

Standing reclined pull-ups: 3 sets 15 reps
Reclined barbell press w/ 35 lbs: 3 sets 15 reps

Standing (lat?) pull down: 3 sets 15 reps each arm w/ 20 lbs
Romanian dead lift
( standing with barbell in each hand, bend at waist then stand straight and curl) w/ 25lbs each hand 3 sets 15 reps

No cardio today but feeling a little better, will try tomorrow to walk a little

Frustration and pain...

2006-07-10T22:32:00.000-07:00

I don't want folks to worry that I'm becoming discouraged but I am frustrated. Because of my size I guess i was really expecting some dramatic changes right away from working out and dieting. Ok so my clothes fit a little better and my posture is better and I know that i've put on muscle but I honestly don't think the fat is really comming off. And to top it all off my heel has been killing me the last 2 days which has provented me from getting any walking in. I had just decided to push myself to doing at least 1/2 hour of treadmill every day and the moment I made that plan my heel acts up and I can't do what i want.

Just for info's sake I fractured my growth plate in my left ankle when I was 13 and from time to time it hurts for a few days. I know it will eventually go away but at the time when I would really like to push myself I can't so it only serves to magnify the difficulty I'm having with what I expected to be my progress at this point.

Fortunately I can bare the pain enough to get through anything my trainer throws at me during our work out so at least I can do that. And I know someone will suggest it but i'm still too heavy for the stationary bike or the eliptical trainer.

I hate to complain. It's just a minor problem but with the scale troubles and all this...uuuugh! Besides without showing some sort of progress this blog is just me rambling about doing nothing. I just hope everyone will give me a little time to get this all humming like an oiled machine because I promise that I will get to my goal but instead of humming along and then hitting a rough patch I seem to be starting in one...

July 10, 2006 meals

2006-07-10T22:27:00.000-07:00

Meal 1: Soy Shake

Meal 2: Chinese food/ Sesame Chicken over rice w/ Steamed broccoli

Meal 3: Turkey sandwich on Whole Wheat bread w/ mayo and mustard and fresh spinich and 1 apple

Meal 4: 3 celery stalks w/ peanut butter

Water and Vitamins

Wish me luck...

2006-07-10T01:39:00.000-07:00

I'm off to try to sleep.

july 9, 2006 meals

2006-07-10T01:32:00.000-07:00

Meal 1 and 2: I don't know if i've mentioned my horrible insomnia lately but today i was able to sleep in until really late in the day so I skipped my first 2 meals. I know that a lot of you have been concerned about my diet lately but I assure you that this sleep was very important to me as I have been unable to get to bed some nights until 5 or 6 in the morning and then have only slept for 2 or 3 hours before starting my day. I'm hoping to get some sleep over the next few days and start to resume a better diet so please bare with me and thank you for your messages of concern.

Meal 3: Sliced turkey sandwich on whole wheat bread w/ fresh spinich, mayo and mustard. I apple

Meal 4: Grilled chicken sandwich on whole wheat bun w/ lettuce, mustard and mayo

Water and Vitamins

H20

2006-07-09T02:21:00.000-07:00

"My Water Bottle" (The Creed of the Dieter)
rewritten by Sean Perkey

This is my water bottle.

There are many like it, but this one is MINE.

My water bottle is my best friend. It is my life.

I must master it as I must master my life.

My water bottle without me is useless. Without my water bottle, I am useless.

I must fill my water bottle true.

I must drink more than my fat who is trying to kill me.

I must out drink it before it out drinks me. I will...

My water bottle and myself know that what counts in war is not the brand we drink,

the cost of our water, nor the gulping sounds we make.

We know it is the volume that counts. We will drink deep...

My water bottle is human, even as I, because it is my life.

Thus, I will learn it as a brother.

I will learn its weaknesses, its strengths, its parts, its accessories,
its lid, and its capacity.

I will ever guard it against the ravages of weather and damage.

I will keep my water bottle clean and ready, even as I am clean and ready.

We will become part of each other. We will...

Before my Trainer I swear this creed.

My water bottle and myself are the defenders of my health.

We are the masters of our fat.

We are the saviors of my life.

So be it, until there is no fat, but rather a sexy and slimmer me.

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We all know that water is one of the most improtant factors of getting a staying fit. It's simple math. We are made of water. We must drink water. Unfortunately it's not the easiest thing in the world to do. Take me for instance. For years I drank nothing but sugary sodas. Nothing else. And I don't mean just a couple of cans a day. I would seriously drink gallons daily. It took me developing diabetes to make a change and even then I just changed from sugar to diet and kept on drinking gallons of artificialy sweetned soda daily.

With the start of this process of losing weight and starting to exercise my trainer asked me to consider giving up soda all together and just drink water. Or at least cut out drinks with fake sweetner and caffeine. I can proudly say that for the most part I am drinking nothing but water now (I do have the occasional flavored water and sobe lean) and I'm finding that I really like it. As a matter of fact I sometimes get the same rush from a sip of cold water as I used to get from my first swig of soda in the morning. There was a transition, don't think it was as easy as that. For quite a while I could never quite quench my thirst no matter how much water I drank. Oddly enough my mouth would dry out soon after drinking which really made me doubt the whole water thing. But I stuck with it and now water is amazing...like nature's fruit juice! I get it now!

For those of you out there that need to drink more water. You should really give it a shot. Stick with it and you'll eventually be won over. Another thing you can do is get yourself a really cool water bottle. Something stylish or just fun to carry and it will encourage you to fill up! I, personally carry a Nalgene plastic bottle like you see below. It fits my hand well and has a great rubberized lid that makes it easy to open. Nalgenes are very durable and they don't retain odors so if you want to carry water one day and soup the next you can do it without worry! Plus I think they just look cool and I bet even your friends will notice and want one as well...you might even start a trend amoung your friends and then you will all be happier and healthier! How sweet would that be? And, all because of a kick a** water bottle!